Ramblings about season 2
by CoccinelleMenthol
Summary: How I would have like season 2 to go as far as Julia and Michael are concerned. It will never happen since there will be no Frank and no Michael but let's dream a little. Includes mainly Julia, Frank, Tom, Leo and of course Michael, and a special appearance by Will Truman and Jack McFarland for the Will & Grace lovers.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi everyone ! Here is my first try at writing a fanfiction, I would really like to know what you think about it.**

The show was a success, even if it seemed like they would never make it. Karen was incredible, Julia still couldn't believe a girl so green had achieved so much in such a small amount of time. The last song was a success too, everyone applauded just like Eileen wanted to. But Julia still couldn't get rid of her nausea. Something was wrong.

As she was still trying to get over this feeling she didn't notice the agitation happening in the dressing rooms. Soon the ambulance sirens brought her back to reality. Ivy had apparently taken some drugs, many drugs judging by her state and had to be sent to the hospital. Tom looked devastated, she couldn't let him go alone. She took her arm and jumped in the ambulance with him.

"Tom, are you okay ?"  
"How can I be ? I should have seen it coming. Sam told me she was taking way too many pills and I didn't do anything to stop her. I even made it worse by telling her she was Marilyn this morning and not saying anything when Derek chose Karen. Her whole world is collapsing. As her friend I should have done something."  
"Oh Tom... Nobody is blaming you, we already had a lot to do. You can't be everywhere."  
"I'm blaming me."  
"Yeah I know, that's why you're a good friend. And she is lucky to have you, she is going to be okay."

He put his head in his hands and Julia put her arms around him all the way to the hospital. She couldn't bear seeing him as defeated. Tonight they should have been celebrating, instead they were in an ambulance and Ivy was looking really bad.

* * *

After some time sitting in silence in the waiting room, Ivy's mother finally came with some good news. Ivy was going to be okay, they were waiting for all the drugs to get out of her system but she was going to be fine.

"She is going to be fine." Tom repeated. He looked so relieved, even if he still had some tears in his eyes. Sam was sitting next to him, all the ensemble had joined them at the hospital. They were all relieved. Tom looked around searching for Julia but couldn't find her. He turned to Sam.

"Where is Julia ?"  
"I think she went to the bathroom, she seemed a little sick."

Tom quickly raised from his chair and went to the bathroom door. He was beginning to feel a little bit concerned about Julia.

"Julia, are you in here ?"

As he said that she got out of the bathroom and sat on the ground just next to it. He sat too and put his arm around her shoulders.

"I threw up again, Tom. I never threw up."

She looked at him with scared eyes. They were both thinking the same thing, *not since she was pregnant with Leo*.

"Oh god... Tom, what if I'm pregnant ?"  
"You can't be, you told me Frank couldn't have kids anymore. That's why you are going through the whole adoption process."  
"He can't."  
"...but Michael can."

She stopped looking at him, she couldn't bear his judging eyes. She already wasn't feeling good about herself but seeing him judging her made her feel a lot guiltier. Maybe more than Frank did.

"You are so screwed."  
"Maybe not. Maybe I'm not pregnant, maybe it's just stress."

* * *

Julia was now in Tom's hotel room bathroom. She was waiting for him to come back with the pregnancy test. It gave her some time to think, what would she do if that test was positive ? Frank couldn't handle it, he already had an hard time trying to forgive her while seeing her work with Michael. What if she was carrying his baby ? Michael would be in her life forever.

Tom finally came back cutting her thoughts short.  
Now she would find out where she was standing.

Tom grabbed her hand while they were waiting for the result to appear.

"No matter what, remember that I love you."  
"I know."

Negative. It was negative. She wasn't pregnant.  
Tom let go a big sigh of relief and looked at her with a big smile. He hugged her. She should have been happy, she had imagined that option in her head and this was a happy one. It meant her marriage with Frank still had a chance. It meant that once Bombshell was over she wouldn't have to see Michael ever again. However all she could feel was disappointment, and she just didn't understand why. And Tom wouldn't. So she forced a smile on her face and said she was going for a walk. She needed some air, some time to think.

* * *

Frank finally came into the room. Julia had been waiting for him anxiously, desperately trying to figure out what to tell him. In fact she knew exactly what she wanted to tell him, what she wanted to do, she had never been more clear-headed. She just didn't know how to say it. Anyway, she would have to. She couldn't pursue her life by living a lie.

"Hi". He smiled at her, he looked happy.  
"Hi". She responded. She took a big breath. "Frank, I have something to tell you."  
A shadow crossed his face and he frowned. He sat down on the bed next to her. He knew this couldn't be good. In fact he had been waiting for this for quite a while now.  
"I threw up yesterday, several times. I thought I was pregnant." Frank's eyes widened, she could read surprise on his face but she continued before he could say anything. "I'm not. Don't worry. It just made me think... I should have been happy not to be pregnant, you know it wouldn't have been yours." He looked as if she had punched him, he was obviously hurting every time she mentioned Michael, even it wasn't really explicit. "The thing is... I was not that happy to go back to trying to fix our marriage. This pregnancy could have been a way out for me, and I think I have to seize it even if in the end I'm not pregnant. I'm so sorry, I just have to. I know I am the problem, believe me... I know. I'm the one who brought the weirdness in our marriage, I'm the one who has been asking you to get over it for the past few weeks, and for that I'm sorry. I just can't do it anymore. My suitcase is ready, I booked an early train for me, I'm going to take my stuff from home before you and Leo arrive. Tell him I will call him later."

And she stopped talking. She looked him right in the eyes, waiting for him to react. She had managed to stay calm through all she had to say but her feelings were a mess. Regardless of everything she had been married to him for eighteen years. But he didn't say anything, he looked blank, like if he was still trying to incorporate the informations. Maybe it was better than a big scene. Anyway she couldn't manage a big scene right now, so she stood up, took her suitcase and left, just looking one more time at that man she had loved for such a long time before closing the door.


	2. Chapter 2

**Here is chapter 2, sorry that there isn't any Michael & Julia in it but I feel more like building things slowly. Sorry about my English but I'm French and I don't have any English lessons anymore. Please review !**

It had been one week since Frank had last seen Julia. He had had time to think about everything she had said and wanted more. She couldn't just end 18 years of marriage in five minutes. They had to talk about it. He had tried calling her but her phone was off. He winced at the irony of this. A couple weeks ago he was the one who didn't want to pick up the phone. Now he was the one trying desperately to get in touch and he hadn't done anything to deserve that. He was mad. He was the perfect husband dammit !

That's why he went to Tom's place, thinking he might find Julia there. This was definitely the place where she would have chosen to stay. So he was here knocking on the door, trying not to look too mad. He was here to confront her and he wouldn't go away. Tom opened the door and invited him in. He seemed really surprised.

"Hi Frank, how are you doing ? Julia isn't with you ?"  
Now it was Frank's turn to look surprised. Why would Tom think Julia was with him ? And he didn't look like he was covering for her, he just looked surprised.  
"No, I thought she was staying at your place."  
"Why would she stay at my place ? Something happened ?"  
"She left me."

Tom's jaw dropped. He had many reasons to be astonished. Why Julia would leave Frank when she was trying so hard to save her marriage ? and more importantly why hadn't she told him anything ? He sunk into the couch and invited Frank to do the same by a wave of the hand.

"When ?"  
"Last week in Boston."  
"And she didn't say anything about where she was going ?"  
"No."  
"You didn't ask ?"  
"I was a bit taken aback, I didn't say anything."  
"But if she is not at my place, where is she ?"  
"I have no idea, but how come you didn't know ? Usually you are both checking up on each other like every five minutes !"  
"Things have been a little crazy lately... With all the Ivy stuff..."  
"What Ivy stuff ?"  
"You didn't hear ? She took a lot of pills during the last show and everyone is talking about whether or not she should stay in the production. EVERYONE is talking about it !"  
"I have no contacts with the show anymore... remember ?"

Tom's face suddenly changed. He hadn't realized yet. Julia had really left Frank. It was so weird. He looked Frank in the eyes, it seemed like he hadn't gotten much sleep in the last few days.

"Sorry. I feel like it's partly my fault..."  
Frank raised his eyebrows, he couldn't see where Tom was going with this.  
"I shouldn't have let them hire Michael Swift back."

Frank couldn't bear the mention of that name. Once his talented friend, now the source of all troubles. Actually he never really was his friend, just a polite somebody who came sometimes to have drinks with them. Frank could see why now, how could you make friends with the husband of the woman you had an affair with for quite a while ? But he couldn't just be mad at Michael. Of course what he did was wrong, unforgivable. But wasn't what Julia did worse ?

"You did nothing wrong. You acted like you should have under the circumstances. Julia should have done the same... But why would you say that ? You think she left me to go with him ?"  
"I don't know more than you do but... I know you don't want to hear it... but you should know that there is more than just lust between them. At least that's what I think."

Frank looked defeated. He wasn't blind, what Tom was saying he already knew it. He had seen it, he had understood it. In one way it was a good thing because it meant that his wife wasn't ruining their marriage for something completely meaningless, like you do with things for which you don't care. But on the other hand it was painful, so painful. She had fallen for someone else. He could see it in her eyes when she was with him. She was looking for that exciting feeling she got with Michael but no longer with her husband. They had it in the beginning but it eventually wore off. Now he couldn't see how to get it back, how to get her back.

"So you think she is at his place."  
"Let's not jump to conclusions..."  
"I have to go there."

He suddenly rose from the couch with a determined look on his face. It was like he had suddenly woken up from a long sleep. Tom rose too, with a little less determination than Frank.

"I'll go with you. I know what happened last time you talked to him and I can't have one of our leading roles damaged before the show."

Frank smiled at that thought and waited for Tom to grab his coat and cell. He knew that Tom was more concerned about Julia than Michael. He could see that he was upset about not knowing what had happened. Julia was supposed to be his best friend.


	3. Chapter 3

Frank and Tom didn't exchange any words on the way to Michael's flat, they were too wrapped up in their thoughts. They didn't think that Julia's thing with Michael was that serious, and they were both hurting. In the elevator they finally exchanged glances.

"What do we do when he opens the door ?" Tom asked.  
"I have no idea." Frank looked at the elevator's doors, waiting for them to open.

When it finally did they both came out and heard voices further down the corridor. One quick look made them stop and quietly take one step back. Michael was standing in front of his door holding his son. His wife was standing in front of him with the toddler's bag on her shoulder. It didn't look like a pleasant talk.

"Michael, we have already been over this. You are the only one to blame here ! If you had thought about Artie earlier maybe you wouldn't be in this mess."  
"I know I did wrong, but you can't keep me from seeing my son !"  
"I know. That's why I brought him to you this weekend, but you can't expect more from me."  
"Monica, please..." He looked at her, begging her with his sad translucent blue eyes but she didn't fall for it, not after what he had done to their family.  
"No Michael, I really can't. Now give him back to me, we have a plane to catch."

He reluctantly complied, having no other choices, but his heart broke when he saw his son's big blue eyes full of tears looking at him over his mother's shoulder as she left him standing there, with nothing left. Behind him was only an empty flat where he couldn't bear to spend all his nights alone. But to be completely honest the woman he would have wanted to find in this apartment wasn't Monica. It was the woman who already occupied all of his mind, that red-headed woman he could never have, that incredible woman who wasn't his.

He was interrupted in his thoughts by the surprising vision of Tom and Frank walking right towards him.

"Frank ? Tom ? What are you doing here ?"

Frank and Tom looked at each other, wondering what to say and who would say it. Finally Tom took the first step as he was the most relaxed of the two.

"We were wondering if by any chance Julia wasn't... er... staying at your place ?"

The surprised look on his face was even stronger than when he first saw them in the corridor. Why would they think that ? There was obviously something he didn't know and he couldn't say if it was good or bad.

"No. Why ? Is she okay ?"

The three of them were still standing in front of the door, you could feel the embarrassment in the air. Frank couldn't get the words out of his mouth. With Tom it wasn't such a big deal because he knew he was on his side, at least on that particular point. But with Michael it was a big deal, it was admitting he had lost her, and probably to him. Yet, if they wanted this encounter to be useful, they probably should play the honesty card.

"She left."  
"What do you mean she left ? She left town ? She left the show ?" Michael wasn't really trying to make this easier on Frank.  
"She left me, Michael. Happy ?"  
"Of course not, I... I want her to be happy and you and Leo seem to be what makes her happy." He was lying of course. He had so many feeling rushing through his head and happy might have been one of them, even though he wasn't sure what it meant to him. She had left her husband, it could only be a good sign for him. But how come she hadn't came to him ? He suddenly became aware of Tom and Frank staring at him and invited them in. They all went to sit down in the living room.

"And you don't know where she is ?"  
"Do you really think we would have come here if we knew ? You're the last person I want to see !" Frank was beginning to lose his cool.  
"I'm sorry, Frank. I really am."  
"You know what ? I don't want to hear it. I didn't came here for that. I came here to find my wife and she obviously isn't here so we'd better go."

Frank and Tom rose and turned to leave. But Michael couldn't just stay there wondering what had happened so he took a chance.

"Wait... Can I... come with you ?"  
"There is no chance in hell you could..." But Frank couldn't finish his sentence as Tom, who had been very discreet up until now, interrupted him.  
"Yes."  
Frank suddenly turned to Tom, stunned. Michael took advantage of his confusion to argue his case.  
"If something really is wrong with her I want to be there. Before being anything else we are friends, you know that, Frank. What we did was stupid and we both agree on that." Another lie. Two actually. They didn't really begin as friends and he wasn't at all sorry for what he had done. Even if he kept assuring everybody of the contrary, his feelings for Julia were sincere. Anyway Frank didn't seem at all convinced. Who would be ? So he tried another approach. "If you let me go with you, I promise this will be the last time I see her. Just let me have this last one."

Frank still wasn't really convinced but he agreed anyway, since he had reached a point where nothing could be worse. A little more weirdness couldn't kill him. And maybe Julia would be more inclined to tell the whole truth if everyone was there to uncover the parts where she was lying, as they all knew a different part of her.

However the problem of where to look for her still remained. So Frank reluctantly decided to ask Leo. He knew his son was aware of his mother's location, as he had visited her a few times. He hadn't dared to ask him though because he didn't want him to get in the middle of all this, but he had no choice left. So the three of them went back to the Houstons' house and found a Leo who couldn't believe the association of his dad and his mother's lover. He couldn't resist for long at that and quickly gave up on covering his mother.

"She is with an old friend from college, Will... something. I'll take you there."  
"Will... Truman ?" Frank couldn't believe it.  
"Yeah exactly, do you know him ?"  
"Oh yes, unfortunately I do. He hates me with every fiber of his being."

**And here is chapter 3 ! It might be a little bit unrealistic but I really wanted to come to the point where the three of them united. Please review !**


	4. Chapter 4

**I have tried to put some Will & Grace references, I hope you will get it. Anyway let me know what you think !**

Will went to look who was at the door. He wasn't expecting anyone, or at least anyone who was civilized enough to knock on the door, but Julia was in the shower. He was surprised to see Leo there but when he finally opened it he was even more surprised to see that he wasn't alone. Three men were standing behind him. He could recognize Frank, even if he had changed in the past eighteen years. He would always recognize the man who had put so much distance between him and his best friend. It was his fault he hadn't seen Julia in so many years, whereas, before Frank came into her life, they both knew every move the other was doing. Maybe it was for the best. That way they both had built a family and stopped that weird dependant relationship they had. He had "married" Vince and adopted two children. She had finally made it to Broadway and raised a son she loved. Even if her family seemed to crumble she had been happy. He knew it. But he still couldn't forgive Frank.

"Frank."  
"Will."

They didn't shake hands. Just a slight move of the head.  
He looked at the other two men, having no idea who they were.

Tom took one step towards him and shook his hand. "I'm Tom, Julia's writing partner."  
Will smiled, he finally met his replacement.

Michael took one step forward and raised his hand too. "Michael." He didn't really know what to add after that. He wasn't really anything official to her.  
But Will didn't need any more informations. He knew exactly who Michael was. His eyes widened a little at the surprise of seeing him with Frank, but he shook his hand anyway.  
Michael could only see sympathy in his eyes. He felt a little bit weird seeing that the man in front of him seemed to know everything about him but he, on the other hand, had no idea who 'Will' was.

"I'm sorry but Julia doesn't really want to talk yet." He was standing in front of the door, blocking the entrance.

Frank was about to lose his temper and yell at that annoying lawyer who would do anything to make sure Julia didn't change her mind when it came to leaving him. He was probably glad she had finally gotten rid of him, but he couldn't let go without a fight. Tom sensed it and interrupted.

"We just want to know where she stands, she hasn't talked to anyone of us since Boston and we are a little bit worried. We all care about her."

Will looked at all of them. Tom was obviously honest and apparently had the best intentions. Frank seemed mad but he couldn't really blame it for it, Julia would probably have to deal with it one day or another. As for Michael it was more difficult to see what he was really after but he had that desperate look on him which ended convincing Will of letting them in.

The three of them sat on the couch, Tom in the middle, as Leo was looking for drinks in the fridge.

Will looked at them for a second before realizing they were waiting for Julia. "Julia is in the bathroom, I'll go look for her."

So he went in the bathroom and the room fell silent. Tom couldn't bare it.  
"It's a nice apartment."  
They all went with the beat.  
"Yes, it hasn't changed much since I last was here, an eternity ago." Frank said.  
"Mum told me she used to live here."  
"Yes she lived here for a few years with Will."  
But they were interrupted by shouting noises coming from the bathroom. Apparently Will and Julia had forgotten that the walls were really thin.

_"Will, there is no way I'm getting out of this shower !"_  
_"You have to ! I let you hide here for a week but it's time to face the music."_  
_"I'm not going."_  
_"Yes you are."_  
_"Let go of me, I'm naked !"_  
_"I have seen you naked a thousand times, Jules. It's not going to stop me. Take that towel and get out of the shower, I'll bring you some clothes !"_

Michael was feeling really uncomfortable. It was already bad to be in the same room as all of these people who seemed to be judging him and with whom he couldn't exchange a single word, but on top of that he was still trying to figure out what Julia's relationship with Will was and his conclusions weren't really pleasing him. There was the fact that Frank seemed to really hate Will, the fact that he used to live with Julia before she married her husband, the fact that he hadn't had a second of hesitation before walking in the bathroom while she was in the shower, the fact that he called her Jules, a nickname he thought he was the only one to use... All of that made him jealous, even if he had no rights upon her. And the thought of Julia naked just behind this bathroom door added other feelings to all the ones he was already feeling, making his head an even bigger mess.

Finally she got out of the bathroom with a pair of shorts and one of Will's old T-shirts, her hair dripping water all over her back. She was really different from the confident woman with all her scarves and accessories that she was in the rehearsal space, but they had all already seen her like that. They were all part of her close circle. The one circle to whom she owed an explanation.

She went to plant a kiss on Leo's head and talked to him calmly.  
"Maybe you could go for a walk with Will."  
"Sure." He wasn't a boy of big words.

Will grabbed his coat while moving his lips to say :_ 'You're gonna be ok ?'_  
She nodded. She had no other choice.  
He came really close to her and leaned to reach her ear : "I don't even need to hear him sing." He made a small move to leave but came back to her ear : "You little minx." They had always had their way of talking, and it was coming back bit by bit. He had missed it.  
He then walked out with a knowing smile on his face, followed by Leo.  
She smiled too. She had his blessing.

Michael hadn't heard what he had just said into her ear. Otherwise he wouldn't have been so jealous. Seeing them so close had just hit something in him. It was one of the strangest thing since he had never been jealous. With his wife he just didn't care, but there was something about Julia...

Once the door closed Julia sat down in the chair facing the couch. She had no idea what to say. Especially to the three of them. She couldn't even lay eyes on Michael. She knew too many feelings would immediately follow and it was neither the place or time. She looked at Tom with a misery look on her face. He immediately understood.

"Michael and I are going to let you talk. You probably need privacy. We will be outside."

They both walked out and closed the door behind them. Then they sat on the floor next to the elevator doors.

"You think she is going to be okay ?" Michael asked.  
"I think so, Will is a really good friend of hers."  
Michael's face probably did something weird to the mention of the name because Tom laughed.  
"What's so funny ?"  
"Jealous much ?"  
"No I'm not."  
Tom stared at him with a mocking eye.  
"And what if I am ?"  
"Don't you see that he is gay ?  
"He's gay ?"  
"Of course he is ! You heteros really don't pay attention to details..."

The elevator's doors opened, letting out a rather happy man. The man in question stopped at the view of the two men sitting next to his door.

"Holy Peter, Paul and Mary ! The great Tom Levitt is at my door !"

Tom's eyes widened. He wasn't used to such enthusiastic greetings. Now it was Michael's turn to laugh.

"I'm Jack McFarland, writer, composer, singer, dancer, actor and comedian." Saying that he bowed.  
"Waow, I'm impressed." Tom rose and Michael did the same, trying not to laugh too hard. They went to shook his hand but he both kissed them on both cheeks.

_"Dont talk to me like that ! You know I have thought about Leo !"_

Apparently the bathroom walls weren't the only thin walls in the building.  
Jack looked behind him, annoyed.  
"Oh, Julia has always been such a drama queen. Just like Will..."  
"You know Julia ?" Tom enquired.  
"Of course. I'm Will's best friend, which meant having to live with Julia around all the time a long time ago. She has only been back for a week and it's like someone had glued them together all over again. Will's crazy wife is back." His eyes went up as he was saying that. "And she doesn't want to hear my new play. But I'm sure you will, come inside please." He was showing them the door facing Will's.

_"Can you please stop bringing up Michael ?"_

"Yeah Tom, why don't we go in and listen to Jack's play. I'm sure it will be very entertaining."  
"I'm sure it will."

And they both followed Jack into his flat, not really interested by what they were going to see but way more interested in getting out of reach of the fight which was actually going on next door.


	5. Chapter 5

**The inspiration took a little more time to come. I hope that what I finally came up with won't disappoint you. I would love to hear what you think of it, so please review.**

Twenty minutes later, Will and Leo finally came back from their walk, having conscientiously avoided the subject that was on both their minds. Will didn't know Leo well enough and Leo had a hint that Will would tell his mother what the young man would say. She seemed even closer to that long lost friend than she was to her writing partner, which was kind of surprising for the young boy because he had never heard of him. It was a shame because Will would have made the perfect uncle.

They were about to walk into his flat when they heard some singing (if you could call that singing) coming from the flat next door. Will frowned and understood what was happening. Jack was happening. And, judging by the length of their walk, the poor ones in Jack's apartment had probably gone through quite a lot already. So Will turned around and swung the door open.

"Jack, what are you doing ?"

Jack stopped singing, he was standing in quite an acrobatic position and bright and fluffy things were all over the place. He regained a more normal position and looked at Will, pouting because he had been interrupted.  
"I met Tom Levitt in the hall." Tom waved his hand at Will, asking for help, while Jack wasn't looking. Michael still seemed very amused by the whole thing. It had been a long time since he hadn't seen such a bad show, but funny at the same time. It had allowed him to get his mind off the mess that was his life. "So I decided, since you don't allow me to show it to Julia, to show him... Jack 2012 !" He jumped and reached for the sign with a glittery twelve on it, which he hold in front of his left eye, holding two fingers next to his right eye, on the other side of his head. Since 2006 it had become more complicated to mime the name of his show but he was always full of bright ideas.

Leo looked at that crazy man he had already met a few times, since he was always barging in when Leo was with his mum. He still couldn't believe someone like him had managed it through life without any big trouble. It made him quite confident about his future, even if he was sure he would never be as confident as Jack.

Tom took advantage of the interruption for finally getting up. "Well... we'd better go check up on Julia."  
"But you haven't seen the whole show yet !"  
"We'll come back..."_ Or not. _He didn't say it out loud but they were all thinking it.

They all started leaving Jack's flat, while this one was mumbling some very nice things about Will and his impolite manners, adding a little remark about him being chunky (as always). But just as they reached the hallway, an apparently very mad Frank left Will's flat with Julia just behind him. They didn't notice everyone looking at them.

"You're unbelievable !"  
"Me ? I'm not the one who thinks that she has feelings for another person !"

They suddenly noticed that they weren't alone and stared at each other. Eventually Frank looked at his left hand and took off the ring he was still wearing. He then walked into the elevator, followed by Leo and the door closed up on them in the most complete silence.

Julia walked back in Will's flat and sat on the couch. She put her head in her hands and started sobbing. Seeing that, Michael went quickly to sit next to her and started stroking her back with his hand, as to console her. Right now his warmth was the only thing that could make her feel better. She sent away all the protests in her head and rested her head on his chest as he sank deeper into the couch. His arms were around her and she felt safe.

Tom stared at the scene with a slight look of disapproval but it wasn't really the time to make any comment. At that point in fact it wasn't really the time for anything. So he closed the door letting them have some privacy. He was now alone in the hallway, facing Will. An embarrassed smile appeared on his face.

"Weird way to meet, isn't it ?"  
Will smiled too. "Yeah... I would invite you in but it seems like I can't get into my apartment anymore. I had forgotten what it was like to share it with Julia."  
"Indeed, she can be pretty invasive."  
They both laughed.  
"Wanna grab a coffee ?"  
"Sure, why not."

* * *

Julia had fallen asleep. Michael could see the dry tears on her cheeks. He knew it was partly his fault that they were here and it made him sad. He carefully pushed the strands of hair which were covering her face. God, she was beautiful. He still couldn't believe that this was real, that it wasn't just a fantasy of him. Of course she would probably wake up and push him away again, but right now she was in his arms and looked peaceful. His arms had gone numb but he didn't want to move them, afraid of breaking the moment.

But she finally woke up on her own and looked at him. She seemed lost, like when you wake up in a place that isn't yours and it takes you a few minutes to remember where you are.  
"Michael ?"

She pulled away from his grasp and straightened up. Everything was coming back to her. Her talk with Frank had been awful. She had thought after Boston that they would manage to work it out without a fight but apparently they couldn't. She remembered all the harsh words he had said to her. She probably deserved them all but it was hurtful anyway. She remembered losing her cool and talking back to him, or rather shouting back to him. She remembered the embarrassed faces of everyone in the hallway and the nearly crying one of Leo. She was trying her best to make this easy on him but there was just nothing she could do and it was painful.

"I'm sorry about earlier."  
"Don't be."

They were staring at each other, losing themselves into the blue eyes of one another. Their eyes had always been speaking more than their mouths. They could read love in them but they would never have admitted it. After staring for a while they just couldn't resist anymore and they both leaned forward to kiss each other, shyly at first, then in a more passionate way. There was that attraction between the two of them that they just couldn't overcome.

But Julia, once again, backed away, even if it was obviously hurting her.

"Too soon ?"  
She nodded.

"Should I leave ?"  
She nodded again.

So he reluctantly rose and walked at the door. They exchanged a last glance and he knew this wasn't over. This was everything but a goodbye. Suddenly he wasn't that afraid of walking through that door anymore. He would see her again, and soon.

Once he had left, Julia looked at herself in the mirror. She was a mess. She touched her lips delicately with her fingers, she could still feel him. And she could still hear the words of her husband _I'm not the one who thinks that she has feelings for another person_. She didn't think that, she knew it.


	6. Chapter 6

**Here is chapter 6. It would be great to hear your thoughts about where this should be going. I'm open to suggestions !**

An hour later Tom and Will came back from the cafe and found Julia slumped on the sofa watching TV with a bowl of ice cream in her hands. It was almost normal. They sat on each side of her, making themselves comfortable.

"What are we watching ?"  
"Lots of commercials with some shows in between."

They were appalled by what daytime TV was like. Thankfully they had ice cream.

When it became obvious that none of them were really interested in what was happening on the screen, Tom finally put into words the question he had been asking himself during the past hour.

"What happened with Michael earlier ?"  
A few minutes passed before Julia finally blurted out : "We kissed."  
They both turned their head to look at her but she was still staring at the screen.

"And then ?"  
"Then I backed away and he left." She was now looking at her feet.  
"It still feels like cheating." Tom stated.  
She was now looking right at him. "Yes."

* * *

Tom slept on the couch that night. His boyfriend was spending time with his sister and he couldn't see the point of going back to an empty apartment when he could be there for Julia. He hadn't really talked to her that much but his presence was enough.

He was awakened by the delicious smell of eggs and bacon flying across the apartment. Apparently Julia had smelled it too because, just as he was rising up, she walked in the living room with a sleepy face. They both went to sit at the table while Will was filling their plates.

"I don't know what I would do if my friends weren't such good cooks !"  
"I think you would just starve to death..."  
"Or become really fat because of all the ice cream and Nutella you would eat."  
"Hey... I'm not that bad... I can make salad."  
"Yeah, but would you eat salad every day ?"  
"Well, in that case I guess you are going to have to teach me how to cook."  
"Jules... you're a lost cause. You can just order in." They all laughed.

Julia had been thinking during the night. She had finally come to terms with the fact that she needed to move on with her life, and that would probably include living on her own. It was a scary perspective but it had become an unavoidable step in her life. She had gone to Will because it was a safe place but she couldn't lie to herself anymore. Going to Will was going backward, and she wasn't the kind of person who could go forward with her life by going backward. It was like a brief halt and she had enjoyed it but now she had to go back to her life. She just had to break the news to Will.

"Will... I should-"  
"I know, honey."  
"You do ?"  
"Yes."  
"And you don't-"  
"No. I'm going to be fine and you're going to be fine too. I can promise you that, Jules."

Tom watched them hug each other, a little bit puzzled. He didn't understand at all what was happening. He had already felt the same thing last night. Will and Julia could just shorthand everything making it impossible for the other person in the room to understand anything. But it didn't look like if they were doing it on purpose, rather like if their brains were connected and they didn't need the whole sentences to understand what the other one was trying to say. It was quite amazing.

She finally turned back to him.  
"Can I stay at your place for a few days, Tom ? It would give me some time to find a place to live and a lawyer. We could work on some of the arrangements Derek wants us to make on Bombshell."  
"Of course you can stay ! My door is always open to you, and you already have the keys."  
"As for the lawyer I can help, it's not really my field but I have a friend who is really nice and really good at what he is doing."  
"Oh Will, I don't think I could ever thank you enough..."  
"Well... Some tickets for Bombshell, once it's on Broadway, would be a nice way to start..."

She smiled at the thought of getting Bombshell on Broadway. Eileen seemed pretty confident but Derek, being really hard to please, would want them to rewrite a thousand times every little thing that hadn't had the effect he wanted on the audience. It could take forever. Hopefully Eileen could manage him. But going back to working on the show also meant going back to working with Michael, and how to act around him was the only thing she hadn't figured out yet. She wanted to be with him but without it feeling so wrong.

As if he was reading her thoughts, which Tom was persuaded he could do after what he had seen of their relationship, Will chose that moment to intervene.

"And what are you going to do about Michael ?"  
"I haven't really figured that out yet..."  
"If I can give you one piece of advice it's not to mind what other people think. Life is short, you should make the most of it. If he makes you happy, go for it !" As he was saying that Will saw the look of disapproval on Tom's face. They had talked about it at the coffee shop and it was really the one point on which they were disagreeing. Maybe it was because Tom had some kind of fidelity towards Frank that Will hadn't. Or some higher moral values. "But I'm no expert, you know that. I do my share of stupid things."

She didn't respond, she had nothing to say. He was right, the thing that was bugging her was the look of others, what they would think of her getting involved with someone three minutes after her marriage ended, especially with the man who was the cause of it. She would have thought she was above it but she could see clearly now that she wasn't. And it would take some time before she could rise above it, but she was willing to go there for him.


	7. Chapter 7

**Last night I just saw that scene in my mind and I just had to write it down. I hope you will like it ! **

As Julia turned the keys in the lock of what could maybe be her new door, she looked right at Leo. She didn't want to miss any bit of his reaction to her new apartment. She could only buy it if he liked it. But Leo wasn't really showing any feelings and, when the door finally opened, it just looked like he didn't care. Julia wasn't really one to give up though, so she kept her enthusiastic smile on and proceeded in showing him every rooms, talking about all the furniture she could put in it, although she knew it would probably take her a considerable amount of time before doing so. Making a home of an empty flat wasn't going to be an easy task, but she was confident about the fact that she had people ready to help her.

Lately her entourage had been quite supportive, even Derek had offered to help her, which had actually been quite a surprise. Frank had finally conceded that she needed to buy a place of her own and after many negotiations with their lawyers she had been allowed to. She still couldn't believe it had been so hard. After all she was the one who had always earned the money, Frank was just a teacher and he had stopped working for a very long time. But one could argue that she was the one responsible for the end of their marriage so she had tried not to get mad at the procedures, which had been quite difficult because procedures were really one thing she couldn't stand.

Now was all about getting Leo's approval on the apartment. However Leo was still looking blank, without any kind of interest on his face.

"What do you think of it ? Do you like it ?"  
"It's just an empty apartment, mom. Why do you care so much about what I think ?"  
"I want you to be happy, I want you to feel at home in the place I'm going to buy."  
"You know what would make me happy."

Oh yes, she knew. Somehow Leo was still thinking that his parents were going to get back together, that they were just going through a rough patch. She couldn't blame him for that but she didn't want him to keep hoping for something that would never happen.

"I don't even understand why you would leave him. You had been working so hard to make him come back and stay, and then you just flushed everything down the toilet !"

That was the real problem, wasn't it ? Nobody understood why she was leaving Frank. To be truthful, she wasn't even sure she understood it herself. It just felt like the only thing she could do, like there was no alternative. She couldn't picture herself married to Frank anymore, no matter how hard she had tried, for the sake of Leo. Boston had just been the catalyst.

"It had became too awkward between the two of us. You know that. You were there. I couldn't just undo what I did."  
"But you were working through it. He knows what you did was just a stupid mistake. Your marriage is stronger than that."  
"Honey... you don't know that."

He looked at her with a strange look, remembering the kiss he had witnessed between his mother and Michael, the kiss that had started everything.

"Are you leaving dad for Michael ?"

She was a bit taken aback by the question. She knew everyone was asking themselves the same question, they were just not brave enough to ask it to her face. And she was glad they didn't dare to do so, because she was afraid of the answer. Sometimes it was coming to her mind that this might be the case, but she always pushed that thought away, hoping with all her heart that it wasn't. What kind of woman would that make of her ?

"No."  
"Are you going to... _see_ Michael ?"  
"What do you mean '_see_' ?"  
"You know what I mean."

Once again she knew. And once again she was surprised by him being so direct. She was feeling more and more uncomfortable. With Tom she knew she could have avoided the question, he didn't want to push her too hard, afraid she might close up. But with Leo she was feeling like she owed to tell him the truth, or at least a portion of it.

"I'm not sure."  
"What do you mean _you're not sure_ ? You're considering it ?" He was obviously mad. Now feelings were showing all over his face. He was no longer the inexpressive young man who had walked into the apartment a few minutes earlier. Now he was just the kid beginning to realize that his parents may never get back together. Tears were starting to blur his vision. "You said he wasn't right... you said he wasn't right... you said it when you fired him, you did !"

She took him in her arms. Even though he resisted at first, he eventually let go. Her heart was breaking at the pain she had caused.

"I never said I would."  
"But you never said you wouldn't either."

And she couldn't say it. She couldn't lie anymore. So she just tightened her grip around him and they stayed like that for a while. Eventually he stopped crying and took one step back.

"If you really want a new place, this is the one."  
"I think so too."

They both looked around them, trying to imagine what their future life would be like but both reaching a wall of incertitude. They would have to take it step by step. Finally she pulled her cell phone out of her purse and dialed the realtor's number.

"I'll take it."  
She was smiling.


	8. Chapter 8

**Thanks for the reviews, it gave me the motivation to write this chapter ! Tell me what you think of it.**

Sam had stopped by Tom's apartment earlier in the evening and had been surprised to see Julia there. Tom hadn't yet had the chance to tell him the news, but he seemed fine with it. He had even stayed for dinner and now they were all in the couch watching a movie. But Julia could sense that she was in their way and it wasn't really feeling right. She didn't want to disturb Tom's life too much, so she decided to leave the apartment, even if she had nowhere else to go. They protested but finally let her go, excited at the prospect of being alone.

So now she was wandering the streets of New York, without any purpose. It was quite pleasant, the air was still a little warm, reminding everyone of what a hot day it had been, but at the same time she could feel a fresh breeze. The city was all lit up and all she could hear was people laughing. Apparently their joy was communicative because she couldn't help but smile.

Suddenly, as she looked up, she realized her feet had led her to Michael's building. Without further thinking, she decided to follow the strange instinct that had led her here, and pushed the door of the building before climbing the stairs to Michael's apartment.

A few minutes later she was in front of his door. She rearranged her hair and knocked. She was still trying not to think too hard about what she was doing, or about all the reasons she had not to do what she was about to do, whatever it might be.

When he opened the door her mind was still in not thinking mode so she didn't hesitate one second before planting a sweet kiss on his lips.

"Julia ?" Michael couldn't believe what had just happened. He hadn't expected that at all when he had opened his door. Of course in his dreams it had already happened a thousand times but there was usually a big difference between his dreams and reality.

"Hi." She smiled and just continued staring at him.  
As they were both staring at each other without saying anything, she understood she should probably explain what she was doing there. But since she didn't know why she was there, there was nothing to explain.  
"I was in the neighbourhood..."

He laughed, she had no reason to be in this neighbourhood except for him, but it didn't really feel like the best time to point that out. As they were still standing there staring at each other, a little boy appeared behind Michael and pulled his father's sleeve. "Dad, you're missing the movie."

Julia wasn't expecting that, she hadn't thought for one second that Michael might not be alone. Probably what happens when you stop thinking though.

"I... I should go... I had no idea you were with Artie."  
He considered letting her go for one moment but it was just too painful. Julia being at his door was a rare opportunity and he would hate himself for not grabbing it. Besides, he still had the whole weekend to spend some time alone with his son, since Monica had finally agreed to let him have Artie one weekend out of two. It wasn't much but it was better than nothing.  
"No... stay. You could watch the movie with us."  
Just like him a few seconds before, she realized she didn't want to leave at all. She wasn't sure she would have the guts to come back anytime soon.  
"You're sure ?"  
"Of course. What do you think, Artie ? Is it okay if my friend Julia watch the movie with us ?"  
The toddler nodded and ran back to the couch. If it meant his father was coming back to watch the movie with him, he had no problem with it.  
"I hope you like Disney..." Apparently Michael hadn't managed to convince his son of watching anything else.

She came in and he closed the door behind her.  
They sat on the sofa with Artie in between, in a desperate attempt of not touching each other. But, as the film was progressing, their feet, which were resting on the table in front of them, were gradually coming closer and closer to one another. When they finally touched, Julia shivered and she could sense that it had had a pretty strong effect on Michael too. They both quickly took their feet off the table. Artie was the only thing that was keeping them from throwing themselves at one another. They were trying not to look at each other, but sometimes their eyes were meeting for a few minutes, during which they couldn't seem to be able to breath normally anymore. Luckily Artie was half asleep so he couldn't sense the tension around him.

When the movie finally ended Artie opened his sleepy eyes and looked at his dad.  
"I'm hungry."

"Yeah, I'm starving too. What about you, Julia ? Have you already eaten ?"  
"Only some small healthy things with Tom and Sam, I could really use some more food."  
"Do you hear that, Artie ? Julia agrees with you : no healthy food. What do you want then ?"  
"What about pizza ?"  
"Pizza !" Artie was now fully awake and already dreaming about a huge pizza with lots of toppings on it.  
"What am I going to do with both of you ? Can we at least have some vegetables on it ?"  
"Yuck..." Artie's disgusted face made them both laugh.

While Michael had gotten up to order the pizza, Artie went on Julia's lap. She was surprised because Leo had always been a shy kid, he would never have done that after only a few hours. But she didn't mind, Artie was really adorable. He started playing with her hair, amazed by their color and how much there were.

When Michael came back into the room he was surprised by the sight of his son on Julia's lap. If possible, it made him love her even more. This scene was really close to perfection.

"The pizza should be coming anytime soon."

He went to sit next to them and put his arm on Julia's shoulders.  
"You know, Artie, Julia is a really good story-teller. She is the one who writes all the songs that I'm singing in the Marilyn musical. If you ask her nicely I'm sure she would love to tell you one."  
"Tell, tell !"  
"What do we say Artie ?"  
"Please..."

Julia laughed. It had been a long time since she had last done that, but she complied. How could she resists to such an adorable child ? Moreover it was bringing back good memories of the time she used to tell story to Leo.

When they heard a knock on the door, Michael was the one to get up to go pick up the pizza, he didn't want to interrupt the story. But when he opened the door his smile instantly faded. It wasn't the pizza guy, it was Monica. Apparently Artie had forgotten one of his favorite toys. It wasn't a big deal but it brought him back to reality.

Just as she was going to leave, Artie and Julia laughed, probably at some twist in the story, and Monica couldn't help but notice the feminine laugh next to his son's.  
"Michael, who is with Artie ?"

He didn't respond, he could see that she was going to get mad and he couldn't do anything to stop it.

"This had better not be her."  
She came in the apartment, uninvited, and rushed to the living room. She stopped at the vision of Julia having fun with her son. Fury was taking over her. She grabbed her son without a single look at the other woman and went to stood in front of Michael.  
"You're unbelievable ! What were you thinking ? So much for the 'just a one-time mistake' !"

Julia could see that this wasn't going to end well and that she had no place in the middle of it. She gave Michael an apologetic look and quickly got out of the apartment while Monica was too busy yelling at him to even notice. She ran into the delivery guy in the hallway and paid for the pizza, assuming this was probably better than letting him wait for Michael or Monica to notice him. Then she put the pizza next to the door and quickly went down the stairs, not really willing to wait for the elevator with the delivery guy when she could still hear Monica yelling.

How was it that everything was so hard for them ?


	9. Chapter 9

**Not really my favorite chapter but I had to say something about the musical and since I have no idea of what's the next step for the show... I love reading your reviews, so please let me know what you think !**

Eileen had called earlier that day. She seemed serious, something was probably wrong with the show. But Tom and Julia had decided not to worry too much until they meet in her office with Derek. She had promised she would explain everything there. They had also decided to walk to her office instead of taking a cab, it was something they hadn't done for a long time and it was really a shame. They loved to walk arm in arm through Central Park, talking to each other about everything that popped into their minds.

"So, how did things go with Sam last night ?"  
Tom responded to that question by a face that was telling much more than words could ever do. Julia laughed, she was glad his relationship with Sam was going so well. He deserved it. Maybe he could even top his five-months record.

"And you, what did you do last night ?"  
She blushed. Maybe she shouldn't have led him to the subject of their respective evenings.  
"I walked around town and ended up at Michael's."  
If she couldn't tell her best friend, who could she tell ? She just had to stop being so afraid of what his reaction might be. But maybe this was actually the problem. It was so hard to tell Tom because she knew his reaction mattered to her. He was a part of her brain. If this part didn't agree with the other one she was stuck. And she could sense that something in him would never let go of the fact that Michael wasn't good for her, no matter how hard she would try to change that.

"Have you slept with him ?" She could see that he thought she had, and how could she blame him ? If it hadn't been for Artie and Monica, she probably would have.  
"No."  
"But you don't seem to scream at the idea... you would have wanted to. Am I right ?"  
It was her turn to look at him with a face which was far more expressive than words. That night on the sofa she had really wanted Michael and she was still startled by the intensity of this feeling.  
He sighed.  
"Just promise me something. Don't do it to make sure you haven't thrown away your marriage over nothing. Do it because it's what you want, because it's what you think will make you happy. Not for some reassurance."  
They were both staring in each other's eyes. She nodded and he knew he could trust her. They shared a hug and walked the distance that was left in silence.

* * *

Julia and Tom went directly to the couch of Eileen's office while Derek quietly sat on the chair next to it. They had their habits now. Eileen had let them alone because she had to have a phone conversation with some big Broadway guy and she couldn't postpone it. She said it wouldn't take too long.

"So I hear you're living together now, you're like the perfect couple." Derek had his smirk on, he was probably in a good mood. Which was weird seeing all that had happened with Ivy's drug overdose and him having to be there for her, whereas everyone could see that he had a thing for Karen and that it wasn't going to just go away now that Dev had finally let go of her. His personal life looked like a mess, which was ironic because he had always avoided having a personal life like if it was the plague. And now there were probably some bad news about the show as well.

They both rolled their eyes.  
"Just until I'm finished with buying my apartment and putting some furniture in it. You promised to help, remember ?" She had a bright mocking smile on her face.  
"Yeah, yeah... I will." He couldn't remember how he got into this, she had probably caught him off guard. He wasn't really big on helping others.  
"Careful Derek, it might look like you care..." Tom liked teasing Derek, even if he would never admit it. As far as people were concerned, he hated everything about Derek. Admitting that he was finding their verbal fight a little bit enjoyable was out of the question.  
It was Derek's turn to roll his eyes. "Yeah, I'm_ a terrible human being without any normal feelings._" He tried to mimic Tom as he was saying that. Julia hid a laugh and Tom started pouting but they were interrupted by the arrival of Eileen into the room.

They all straightened up and looked right at her. She didn't seem really happy. She went to sit at her desk and couldn't seem to find where to start. Now they all seemed worried.

"Jeez, are you going to tell us what's wrong or just sit here and watch us ?" Derek wasn't really known for being a very patient man.

Eileen took a deep breath. "I'm stopping the musical for now-"  
Tom's eyes widened. "But why ? We did great in Boston !"  
"Yes, we did but-"  
Derek joined the protest. "But what ? We have been working our asses off for the past few months and, even if I admit everything is not perfect, what we have is pretty damn great !"  
"Yes, that's not the problem-"  
Julia couldn't believe what she was hearing either. "Then what is it ?"  
They were all too surprised to let her finish what she had to say.

"Would you all just stop interrupting me and actually start listening to what I have to say ?"  
She paused and they kept silent.  
"We are having a bit of a legal difficulty. Ellis is claiming the idea of the musical to be his and Jerry is backing him up. I don't really know what they want but I think they are trying to shut down the musical. I don't want to give them the satisfaction of actually stopping it but I think we shouldn't go forward with the show until we get some more informations. Every day we are spending rehearsing is costing us a lot of money and I don't want to waste it. But I want to assure you of something : this doesn't mean we're ending it, just that we need some time to figure it out. I promise we'll get Marilyn on Broadway."

They were all startled.  
"That sneaky little jerk" was all Julia was able to say.  
"You were probably right about him from the beginning, Julia, I should have listened to you." Tom couldn't understand why Ellis would do something like that, but maybe he was just trusting people too much.  
"But is he right ? Is it his idea ?" Derek was still trying to figure out what the situation was exactly.  
"He might have been the one suggesting to do a musical about Marilyn, but just as he could have been suggesting to put the bowls in the left drawer instead of the right one. It's not really what makes a musical. He didn't write anything, or thought of any songs. I can't believe this might actually go somewhere."

Eileen was beginning to feel more hopeful now that she had three other persons on her side.  
"Yes, I'm not sure it could go somewhere either. I'm just worried of the part Jerry plays in it. If it was only Ellis it wouldn't be a problem, especially with the whole Rebecca debacle."  
"What do you mean the whole Rebecca debacle ?"  
"Well, that he tried to poison her with peanuts. That would easily destroy his credibility."  
"He was the one who put the peanuts in her smoothie ?" Julia couldn't believe it, she had always felt that he couldn't be trusted but this was so much bigger than what she thought.  
"Just go to the police so we can go on with the show." Derek wasn't even understanding what the problem was.  
"I'm really not sure that's the best idea. I will just try to find out a little more about what they are up to. Until then we're stopping it. I'll tell everyone tomorrow morning in rehearsal, don't be late."

They all let it go, knowing that in the end it was Eileen's call.


	10. Chapter 10

**I had been thinking about this scene for a while now but I'm not really satisfied with the result. I hope you'll enjoy it anyway. And now I have to figure out what to write next... If you have any suggestions I would be glad to read them. And don't forget to review !**

Eileen could see that they were not really on board with her idea and she could understand why. The musical was a big part of their life, whereas for her it was just one amongst others. Nevertheless she was particularly attached to this one and she couldn't really figure out why. Maybe it was the persons working on it, or the trust they had put in her when everybody was leaving because of her divorce, or maybe just because there was something about Marilyn that she couldn't resist... Anyway she would do anything in her power to save this musical and for that she needed to handle it in her own way.

"I would like for this conversation to remain private, if you don't mind. So, for those of you who are involved with a cast member, you can't say a word." Only Tom nodded, maybe because he was the only one in an official relationship. "Actually this is for all of you, not just Tom. I can't believe you're all involved with a cast member !"  
"I'm not involved with a cast member !" Julia quickly protested. Why everyone was assuming that ?  
"Come on, Julia. We're not morons !" Apparently Derek was thinking it too. Eileen nodded in agreement and Tom wasn't saying anything. So much for the support.

"Well I won't say anything if that's what you want to hear. And since there doesn't seem to be anything left to say, I will let the three of you here gossiping about something that isn't happening !" And she quickly went to the door, annoyed that nobody was believing her. Although they were probably right. Maybe she was involved with Michael, even if she hadn't act on it since her break-up with Frank, at least not to the point she would have wanted to.

While she was thinking about it, she got a text from Leo. Apparently he had forgotten his history book at the rehearsal space when she had invited him to come look at how the show was doing. She had seen a lot of him lately but she was still uncomfortable with the fact that she had no home to welcome him into. Frank had agreed that Leo would spend a week out of two with her once her apartment would be ready. She had thought that it would be difficult to convince him but he had Leo's best interests at heart, even though he was still mad at her.

She looked at her watch. 9 pm. It would probably be difficult to get into the rehearsal room but she had already done it once, that famous night, and she didn't want for Leo to get in trouble because of her. It seemed like he really needed that book.

Surprisingly it wasn't difficult at all to get in. All the doors were unlocked. As she was walking in the hallway she could hear voices and laughs from inside. When she finally opened the door to the room she had the surprise of seeing Ivy, Karen, Michael and a lot of other cast members sitting on the floor with many drinks on their side. They had apparently already drunk a lot. They all looked at her as she entered the room and greeted her with big smiles. Ivy walked to her, swaying a lot. She put her arm on Julia's shoulders and raised her drink.

"To our great lyricist who is probably out of job too !"  
"To Julia !" They all raised their drinks and took big gulps.  
She raised her eyebrow.  
"Ivy, what are you talking about ?"  
"We know they are stopping the musical."  
"How did you find out ?" She couldn't see the point of lying to them, since anyway they seemed to know and, even if they didn't, they would by tomorrow morning.  
"It's show business. News travel fast."  
"Well, I don't know exactly what you've heard but it's only temporary and you still all have your jobs."  
"We'll see... But tonight we are getting drunk !" And they all took another gulp.

She received a new text from Leo. He had found the book in his room. Apparently it was a mess and he was sorry she had gone all this way for nothing.

Ivy was holding out a bottle for her. "Do you want to join us ?"  
Julia considered refusing and heading back to Tom's apartment but actually she was in a mood for some drinks. She hadn't done that in a long time. So she took the bottle and went to sit where Ivy led her, which was between Michael and Karen. Probably not the place she would have chosen but she didn't really care. After a few drinks this would look more normal to her.

She leaned towards Karen, so that nobody would hear what she wanted to say.  
"Is that ok for Ivy to drink that much after the... the pill incident ?"  
"Don't worry, I'm watching out for her. We can't stop her from having some fun."  
"When did you two become friends ?"  
"No idea, and I think we aren't really friends. But we always end up together so we learned to care for each other, I guess. But what I'm saying to you right now might just be the alcohol talking, I tend to be sentimental when I drink..."

Julia was a little reassured. Karen seemed to have the situation under control, so she didn't have to keep an eye on Ivy, even if she felt a little bit responsible of looking after her because of Tom. If something happened to Ivy he would be really miserable, and the last thing she wanted was for Tom to be miserable.

A few hours later she couldn't even remember how much she had drunk. She was now feeling totally at ease with her head resting on Michael's shoulders. She had forgotten how much fun he could be.

"I forgot to ask you, how did it go with Monica last night ?"  
"It could have been better." He looked right at her and hesitated for an instant. "She thinks we are sleeping together."  
"Derek and Eileen think we're sleeping together too. So does Leo... At least I think he does."  
Ivy had apparently heard what they were saying because she suddenly turned to them and exclaimed : "What ? You two are not sleeping together ?". Big emphasis on the not. The few people around them turned. Apparently they were surprised too.

They both looked deeper into the other one's eyes, trying to see if they were thinking the same thing. Why should they face the consequences when they hadn't even enjoyed the act ? The reasoning and the conclusions they were drawing from it were probably due to the alcohol but at the time it seemed to make sense. Julia rose clumsily.

"I have to go to the restrooms, too many drinks for me."  
She hadn't unlocked eyes with Michael and it was easy to guess what she was up too. He rose quickly and followed her. They hadn't fooled anyone but they didn't really care. When they left the room they could have heard the laughs and whistles coming from inside if they weren't so focused on one another. She took his hand and lead him to the big restrooms across the hall. They shut the door behind them and started kissing with all the passion they had amassed in the past few weeks. It felt good to finally do what they had been dreaming of for a very long time. They weren't feeling so drunk anymore.

They finally came back into the room. Julia was wearing Michael's shirt and he was bare-chested. It was late so everyone had gone home except Karen and Ivy who were leaving together. Julia blushed a little, she had thought that they would be alone. But the two girls didn't make any comment, they just smiled to the both of them and left. Now they were really alone. Alone with the empty bottles.

They were both looking around them when they noticed the couch. It would always be their couch. Michael raised his eyebrow at her, in a daring way. She smiled and took off her shirt. He lifted her up and carried her to the famous couch, remembering that night from a few months ago.

* * *

The next morning they were awakened by someone entering the room. It was Derek and he had Julia's dress in his hands. He had probably found it in the restroom. Still he probably wasn't expecting to find them both naked on the couch because he gasped in surprise.

"Jeez, Julia ! So much for not being involved with a cast member !" Now he was smirking.

She didn't even respond to that. She was looking for her clothes and blushed when she saw that Derek had her dress. Michael was also looking for his clothes but they were closer so he dressed quickly while the red-headed woman put aside what was left of her pride and walked towards Derek, who wasn't hiding the fact that he was rather enjoying it, to get her dress. Michael noticed that and snapped at Derek. "Do you mind ?"

Derek rolled his eyes. Julia grabbed her dress and quickly put it on.  
The situation was already quite uncomfortable but it would have been worse if everyone had entered the room at the same time. For once she was glad that Derek was early. She knew he wasn't one to judge.

Her head was heavy and she could see that Michael wasn't really feeling good either. Hangovers were no fun. But she had no regrets about what had happened the night before.


	11. Chapter 11

While Julia was in the restroom trying to look a little more presentable, Ivy came in the room and found Michael and Derek cleaning in silence the mess that it was. She was early because even if she couldn't exactly remember what had happened the night before, she knew some cleaning would be necessary if she didn't want to get fired. She was already walking the line with everything that had happened in Boston. Nobody wanted a drama queen in the production, especially if the drama queen hadn't a leading role but was part of the ensemble. She wasn't worth putting up with. She knew Tom had pleaded her case. He was afraid she might do something desperate again and didn't want for her to have more reasons to do so.

She looked at Derek. He didn't even bother walking up to her and kissing her. He just waved and gave her a trash bag. Their relationship had become weird. She suspected Derek of wanting to break up with her, but Tom had probably given him a whole speech about not breaking her heart, at least not until she was feeling better. So she was trying to look as if she was enjoying life and as if she was strong enough to handle it, but the truth was she wasn't. If she was she would have broken up with him herself. But she needed him, she needed not to be alone every night, she needed, if not his love, at least his presence.

"Why nobody invited me last night ? I'm a really cool person to party with."  
"It was more a spur of the moment than a real party, and, no offense, but I think most of the cast didn't really want you there. You're a harsh director, not really a friend." Ivy couldn't really picture him sitting with all of them and having fun. He was always acting like he was above them.  
"Am I that harsh ?"  
"Oh yeah. And your personality doesn't help." Michael grinned.  
"You'd better watch it, I might tell everyone what I saw earlier." He was teasing him but Michael went silent anyway. His relationship with Julia was still very delicate. He didn't even know if what they had done the night before had changed anything. He was hoping it had because he was looking forward to spending more nights like that with her.

Derek apparently noticed Michael's concerned face because he became more serious and stopped what he was doing. "Don't worry man, she cares for you. In the end that's what matters."  
Michael smiled. "Gosh, I hope you're right."  
"I'm always right."  
Ivy rolled her eyes but deep inside her she was glad. She liked it when Derek decided to be nice and put his attitude away. It didn't seem cheesy at all. It reminded her of what a great man he could be, of why she still needed him. And then she remembered that, unfortunately, these moments were really rare, and the sudden joy she had felt was gone.

Julia chose this moment to come back into the room. She was still wearing the clothes she was wearing the day before but she had managed to rearrange her hair and makeup, so that how she had spent the night wouldn't be obvious. She greeted Ivy and went to help them clean up.

When the room finally looked perfect Derek went to his table and Ivy went outside to make a call. Julia checked that Derek wasn't paying attention to them before talking to Michael.  
"About last night-" She paused, she wasn't really sure of what she wanted to say.  
"Please, don't tell me you regret it."  
"I don't."  
He looked relieved.  
"It's just that... Now that we are not married anymore - although technically we still are, but you know what I mean - maybe we could be more... official ?"  
"More... official ?"  
"I don't know... Maybe we could go on a real date for example ? With a home-cook meal, music and everything..." She was blushing. "Oh gosh I feel like I'm in high school !"  
He took her hands and held them against his chest. "I would love to go on a date with you."  
They were staring into each other's eyes, reveling in the moment.  
He finally let go of her hands.  
"But I will not let you cook !"  
She laughed. "Well, you could come to my new place and help me figure out how the kitchen works."  
"That's a date then. Tomorrow at 7pm ?"  
She nodded.

They broke apart as people were beginning to enter the room. Julia went to sit at her table. She couldn't let go of her smile. When Tom joined her she was lost in her thoughts and he couldn't help but notice that she was glowing. He put his hand on one of her shoulders and she turned to him, surprised of seeing him. He sat next to her.  
"So... I guess you did it then." She gave him a guilty smile and nodded. "You look happy."  
"I am."  
He put his hand on hers and smiled to her. In the end it was her happiness that mattered. And he was hoping it would last. After all those sad months she had deserved some happiness.

Eileen finally came in. She checked that everyone was here and that they had all noticed her before speaking. Everyone was fearing what she was about to say.  
"Hi, everyone. I had originally planned to come and tell you about our legal issues and the possibility of stopping the show-" Voices were beginning to raise around her. She waited to have everyone's attention before continuing. "But I had dinner with my ex-husband Jerry last night and we came to terms with an arrangement." She paused but no voices were heard this time, everyone was hanging on her every word. "He agreed to keep us out of troubles at the condition that he would co-produce the show. He also requested to make some changes but promised that in exchange he would get us on Broadway in five weeks and give us all the money we're missing."

Nobody knew what to think of it. On one hand they were now sure of getting the musical to Broadway, but on the other hand they had no idea what the changes would be and how it would affect them. The most worried was by far Derek. He was the one in charge of changes and he hated people forcing them on him, especially producers who had no business in telling the director what to do. But he knew he would have to comply if he wanted the show to go on Broadway.

"What kind of changes ?"  
"I don't know yet but he talked about splitting the role of Marilyn."  
Everyone's eyes widened in surprise.  
"But that's absurd, there is no way the audience would ever buy that !"  
"You'll have to talk to him yourself I guess. I'm sure you can convince him of what's best for the show."  
Tom was also pissed. The show wasn't needing any changes, it was perfect as it was. And he certainly didn't want the future of it depending on Derek and Jerry. "Well I don't !"  
"I agree with Tom. Tom and I wrote this musical and we care about the changes that you make. We should be part of the decisions too."  
"Well, we will all go see Jerry together tomorrow then." After saying that, Eileen turned to the cast. "As for you, you all have two days off. I want you to take that opportunity to get some rest because we have a lot of work ahead of us."

**I'm sorry this took more time than expected. I was stuck. Tell me what you think of it ! Reviews really make me happy.**


	12. Chapter 12

Michael was on time. 7 pm and he was in front of her door. He had been watching his watch for the past two hours, wishing the hands on it would go faster. He was really excited about this first date. It was weird to think of it this way since they had already spent a lot of time together, including a lot of intimate time, but he could understand how she thought of it as their first date. Tonight was not about sneaking around. Tonight he had brought a bottle of wine and flowers and he could guess that she had lighted some candles. She had probably told Tom about it too. Tonight was official. And strangely his heart was beating fast as he rang the bell.

She opened right away and he gave her a little kiss on the lips to say hello. She was really beautiful. She took the flowers and went to put them in water. He followed her into her new apartment, looking around him. There wasn't much furniture yet but a piano was standing in the middle of the living room.  
"The piano before the TV ?"  
"That's what happens when you rely on Tom to help you with the furniture. I don't even play the piano !"  
He came closer and sat to play.  
"And it's tuned !" He looked surprised.  
"First thing Tom made sure of. He was always teasing me about my old piano never being tuned."  
"Yeah, I remember your old piano, that's why I was surprised. I thought this was the one."  
She just shook her head, talking about it would mean talking about Frank keeping the piano and it wasn't really what she wanted to talk about with Michael. In fact she didn't want to think of Frank at all, the thought of him was making her feel uncomfortable.

Michael looked around the piano and saw her latest work. Tom had quickly found a melody and she had already found some lyrics to go with it, it was going to be a nice song.  
"What is it ? I thought you weren't writing new songs anymore."  
"Well, we talked with Jerry and he is a big fan of yours. He thinks we are not giving you enough songs. He is one of those who think that Joe was Marilyn's soul mate, the love of her life, and says we are not insisting enough on that."  
"I thought this was not necessarily the show you were writing." He was teasing her by quoting what she had said to him a few months earlier when he had fought for his character's good name.  
She rolled her eyes. "But what's bigger than love ?" It was her turn to mimic him.  
They both laughed.

"So, what's this one about ?"  
"Joe getting her out of the psychiatric hospital and telling her he would always be there for her."  
"It's sad that they haven't had the chance to get married again. It could have worked, I think he really loved her and that it was reciprocal."  
"Yeah... I think too. But we'll never know, will we ?"  
"I guess we won't. Anyway I'm glad that I'm getting more songs. I was afraid he might want to focus more on Arthur Miller, he hasn't a lot of songs."  
"Well you don't have anything to be afraid of, everyone thinks you're amazing and I think we all are on DiMaggio's side. Arthur Miller is a little bit boring."

She came behind him and put her arms around his neck, resting her head on his shoulder and looking at the music sheet with unfinished lyrics. He looked at it too and started playing the piano and singing. She could never get enough of his voice. Of course everyone was thinking that he was fantastic, how could they not think that ? She unwrapped her arms from around him and sat next to him. She began singing Marilyn's part, improvising the lyrics she still hadn't figured out. Her voice wasn't really as great as Ivy's or Karen's but she was still pretty good.

"You have to write that down, that could totally work."  
"You're right, if I don't write it down right away I'm going to forget." And she went to grab her pen.  
"I'm going to explore the kitchen in the meantime."

A few minutes later she joined him in the kitchen. He had put the big uncooked chicken on the kitchen counter. Tom had bought everything that was in her fridge and she was still wondering how he had gotten the idea of buying that huge scary thing. It was the only thing she could see when she was opening the fridge and it was creeping her out.

She raised her eyebrow and pointed at the chicken with her finger. "You want to eat _that_ ?"  
"_That_ is a chicken and it's really easy to cook. And that way you will have plenty of leftovers for when Leo comes and wants to eat real food."  
"Actually this might be a good idea since he is coming tomorrow."  
"See, I'm full of bright ideas !" He gave her his best smile.  
She went to stand next to the chicken. "So, how do we do this ?"  
"Well... a dish would be useful, maybe some onions, garlic and potatoes too and we're ready to go."  
She found everything he was looking for and a few minutes later he was putting the dish in the oven, trying to understand how the buttons worked. She finally reached for the manual and told him everything he had to do. At least she had made herself useful. Now they had to wait a really long time before everything was cooked. This was her least favorite thing about cooking, the long waiting time between actual cooking and eating.

Touching all the food had made her hungry, so she took some grapes and they went back to the piano. She would have suggested to watch a movie but thanks to Tom there wasn't any TV yet. Instead he helped her finishing the new song and then they went through all the musical classics. After all they were working on Broadway, it was a big part of who they were.

When the beep of the oven could finally be heard they rushed to the kitchen, both starving. Michael opened the door with a confident look on his face, whereas Julia's face was more suspicious. But surprisingly the scary white thing had turned in a real golden chicken and the smell was amazing. They ate it quickly, with the wine Michael had brought, and finished the evening in her bedroom. It was the only place she had had time to decorate but neither one of them was paying attention to that, the only thing they could see was each other.

* * *

The next morning the only thing Michael could see when he opened his eyes was the weird look on Julia's face. He would have expected a happy face and it was worrying him that this wasn't the case. She saw that he was awake and she turned to look in his eyes.

"Good morning." She smiled.  
"Good morning, Jules." He could see the weird look again. "What's wrong ?"  
"Nothing." She turned again, this time facing the wall.

But he wasn't giving up, he leaned upon her and their eyes met again. "I can see that there is something wrong."  
She hesitated a few seconds but finally gave in. "It's just that... I still feel guilty."  
It hurt him a little bit. He didn't know what to respond to that. Why couldn't everything be simple between them ?  
She saw the cloud that she had brought in his translucent eyes. "But it will go away... eventually. I'm sure it will." And she kissed him again, ending their discussion and returning to their favorite activity. But she suddenly noticed the clock. "Michael ! We have to be at rehearsal in twenty minutes !" They both jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom. Michael couldn't help but think that his life would be heaven if he could do that every morning.

**I understood from the last reviews that you would like to see some happy chapters for Julia & Michael, so here is a gift to you ! Let me know what you think of it, I wasn't really inspired. **


	13. Chapter 13

**To answer one of the reviews I just read, I'm updating the story every two or three days, or at least I try to. It depends of the time I have to write a new chapter or of the inspiration I have or don't have. Anyway, here is chapter 13. I hope you'll like it and don't forget to let me know what you think of it, reviews really make me happy. **

When she entered the rehearsal room, Julia went directly to sit next to Tom. She had managed to get there on time, even if she was a little breathless.  
Tom grinned. "I can see your date ran late. I thought it was supposed to be a first date."  
"It was."  
"So you're one of those who have sex on their first date."  
She knew he was teasing her but she blushed anyway. "How can you always tell ?"  
"It's a gift, honey."

They would have pursued their unrelated to work discussion if Derek hadn't interrupted them.  
"Where did you get with the new song ?"  
"Derek, you can't expect us to-"  
But Tom didn't get the chance to finish his sentence as Julia was removing from her purse the complete music sheet with all the lyrics on it. "It's all here, Derek." She gave him a big smile and he took the paper without giving them any more attention.  
"What about thanks, moron ?" Tom mumbled when Derek was already far away. Then he turned to Julia. "I thought you wouldn't have the time to finish it since you were on a date last night."  
"Michael helped me."  
"He did ?"  
"Yes, what's so surprising about that ? After all he is the one who is going to sing it."  
"Of course..."  
"What's going on Tom ?"  
"It's just... Don't let him replace me. With Frank I was safe, but Michael... He is as good a piano player as I am."  
"Don't be stupid. Nobody can replace you. You're just being paranoïd. And Frank was also a good piano player, however he never replaced you !"  
"But he had like zero creativity."  
She couldn't really contradict that and she didn't get the chance anyway. Her phone was ringing.

She went out and came back after a few minutes.  
"It was Leo, he is coming for dinner at my place tonight. He was asking for the directions."  
"Really ? Can I come ? I haven't seen him lately."  
"Of course you can, he will be glad to see you. You're family."  
"And... Can I bring Sam ?"  
"Sure." She was staring at him, not saying anything.  
"What ?"  
"I'm proud of you, you know." He frowned, clearly not understanding what she meant by that. "You're not messing things up with Sam. You're not looking for excuses to run away like you always did with your past boyfriends."  
"Yeah... I think we're serious. It's a little bit scary but in a good way."  
"I'm happy for you, Tom."  
"I'm happy for you too, Honey. At one point I thought you had made the biggest mistake of your life but now I'm sure you haven't."  
"You are ? Because sometimes I still think I have made a big mistake. I don't even know why I did it."  
"I know that I'm not really the king of relationships so my word doesn't mean much, but when you came in the room we would all have had to be blind not to notice that you were happy. And I can tell you that it's been a long time since the last time I looked at you and thought you were truly happy. Frank wasn't enough anymore, we both know it."  
She nodded, maybe Tom was right. In the end Frank had become a friend, and she wasn't ready to give up on love yet. She still had half her life ahead of her. But she would have liked for them to stay friends, she couldn't stand him hating her.

Derek interrupted once again, he was decided to make the best of the five weeks they had and would have wished for everyone to share his decision. He was sick of personal life getting in the way. They were here to work.

* * *

Leo arrived a little bit late, his practice had been running long. He apologized and went to greet everyone. They all seemed very happy and he quickly understood why when he saw the empty bottles next to the sofa. He had probably missed the best part of the evening but it didn't matter because his mother wouldn't have let him drink anyway. It was like the weed, he had recently found out that she used to smoke some after rehearsals but she didn't want him to even try it. Of course one could argue that he was still way too young, however he couldn't help but find it unfair. If she wanted him not to do any of these things maybe she shouldn't either, wasn't she supposed to set the example ? He loved his mother but recently she had been anything but an example for him. He could get over the drinking and smoking pot part since it was only occasional and it wasn't really something he was disapproving, but he still couldn't get over the cheating and leaving part. And it would probably take him a lot of time before forgiving her for that.

They all sat around the table and talked about the show while eating the salad she had just made. Everything was going fine. But then she came with the chicken. Tom's eyes widened while she was serving it and, when they started eating, he was surprised of finding out it was really good.  
"Oh my god Julia, you've really outdone yourself with this one ! I can't believe you did that on your own !"  
"I'm not the one who did it, you can relax, the gift of cooking didn't suddenly come to me out of nowhere." She laughed.  
"Then who did it ? Oh I'm stupid, it's Michael of course."  
Leo suddenly raised his head and stopped eating. She still hadn't told him that she had started dating Michael and it wasn't the way she wanted him to find out. She gestured at Tom, trying to make him stop but he didn't understand, probably because of all the alcohol in his system. He had been drinking way more than her and Sam because Sam had just asked to meet his parents and he wasn't thrilled about the idea.  
"He cooks for you, he helps you with the lyrics of the songs you have to write, he makes you glow... Tell us, Julia, what does he not do ?" He suddenly noticed the three pairs of eyes on him and, even with the alcohol clouding his judgement, he could see he had made a mistake. "Sorry."

But Julia wasn't looking at him anymore, she would have all the time in the world to yell at him later. She was looking at Leo who was staring at his plate, pushing the pieces of chicken around with his fork. There was a complete silence. He finally raised his head to look at her, his eyes were wet. "You're dating him ?"  
"Yes."  
He was staring at his plate. After another long pause he raised his eyes again. "Are you in love with him ?"  
She nodded. She didn't even have to think about it, now she just knew, but the words still wouldn't come out.

He didn't add anything, he just resumed eating. They all did the same in the most complete silence. Eventually the conversation started again but it wasn't filled with enthusiasm like it had been before the chicken. But at least now Leo knew and a huge weight had been lifted from Julia's shoulders, she knew that eventually he would be ok with it. Now was all about telling Frank. She had to tell him if she wanted the guilt she had felt the day before to disappear. And anyway he would find out one day or another. It would probably be better if she was the one telling him.


	14. Chapter 14

**Here is a long chapter for you ! Frank and Julia finally get some closure, I hope you'll like it.**

Julia had finally decided to go and talk to Frank. Almost a month had passed and she still had no idea about how she was going to break the news to him but she was hoping it would come to her while she was around him. When she found herself in front of the door, which had been hers for so many years, she panicked a little but took a deep breath and rang the bell. She could have just let herself in, since she still had the keys but somehow she didn't think it would be appropriate.

Her heart skipped a beat when Frank finally opened the door. He wasn't looking good at all. There were big circles under his eyes and he looked like he had been drinking a little. He was acting a little slow, but she could still tell that he was surprised, which he shouldn't have been since she had told him on the phone about her coming to get a few things.

"Hi Frank. I came with some boxes." Just to make it clearer she showed him the cardboard boxes she was carrying. "I told you I would come." But he wasn't moving or showing any reaction of any kind. "Can I come in ?"  
It seemed to have woken him up. "Sure."  
So she came in. She was almost expecting to find a mess but surprisingly everything was in order, except Frank of course. It kind of reassured her. Maybe the mood he was currently in was just a one-time thing after all. She couldn't picture him being that defeated all the time anyway.

"Maybe I should start with the bedroom."  
"Ok, let me help you."  
And they both went upstairs and into what used to be their bedroom. Her side of the room had barely been touched, almost everything was in the position it had been when she had left. Without any word she kneeled in front of her drawers and started opening and emptying them. It was mostly scarves, she had never realized she had so many of them. While she was doing that, Frank was filling the boxes, without saying anything either. When they were out of boxes (she hadn't wanted to take too many because she would have to carry them afterwards) they just stared at each other, not really sure of what the appropriate thing to do was.  
"Do you want some tea ?"  
She was ready to decline the offer but she remembered she was here to tell him about Michael, and it wasn't going to be very easy since Frank already looked quite dejected.  
"Sure."

As they were both sitting at the kitchen counter drinking their tea, Julia noticed the big photo album laying there. It was probably what Frank had been looking at earlier in the evening, it was probably why he was in such a poor mood. She had no idea why she did that but she brought it closer and opened it. It was filled with pictures of the both of them being happy together, and as she turned the pages Leo appeared on the pictures and they looked even happier if possible. Frank was as engrossed as her in the good memories that this book was bringing back.

"And you remember when..."  
"Of course."  
"And this one ?"  
"It had been such a nice day !"

And they went on like this until the last page had been turned. They were feeling the tears in their eyes and noticing them in the other's eyes. They could look at nothing else but each other. That book was a reminder of their happiness, a reminder of all the good in their marriage and in that instant they couldn't remember the bad. So when Frank leaned closer and started kissing her softly she didn't move, she even responded to it, out of habit. But as their kiss became more passionate, she quickly pulled away.

"Frank, I can't."  
"Why ?"  
"I am..." She had to tell him, now was the moment. "I am dating someone."  
He stopped looking at her, now he was looking at the kitchen counter but she knew in fact he was just avoiding her eyes. "Do I know him ?"  
She just had to tell him. It was like ripping out a band aid. It was going to hurt at first but in the end it was best for everyone. "Yes you do." She took a big breath. "It's Michael."

He gave a big punch on the table that made her jump and he rose. He looked really pissed off and it was scaring her. She had thought he would have seen it coming, that he would be prepared, but apparently he hadn't thought this would happen.  
"That's just great. You cheated on me with him, you even did it several times, and now you won't even kiss me because you're dating him ! What am I to you exactly ?"  
She was afraid to answer. Not that she knew what to answer, in fact she had no idea what to answer, but she couldn't even get a single word out. He saw the fear in her eyes and it was hurting him just as much as what she had just told him. Despite everything that had happened, he still loved her. So he came back on his chair and covered her hand with his.

"I'm sorry. But you can understand how that pisses me off."  
She nodded. He had the right to be angry, she was the one who should be apologizing, not him. "I'm so sorry Frank, I swear."  
He kept silent for a moment, but she could tell he wanted to say something but wasn't daring to.

"I want to know how he took the first place in your heart."  
Her eyes widened in surprise. She wasn't understanding.  
"I know you probably think I don't want to hear it, but I want to know. Or else, I will always wonder what I did wrong."  
"You didn't do anything wrong. I did."  
"Please Julia."

He was begging her and right now she was ready to do anything he would ask her, but this was just weird. Only he was asking so she complied.  
"Remember when we were trying to have kids after Leo ?"  
He nodded.  
"I had had two miscarriages but we kept trying, hoping for a miracle. And then the doctor said you couldn't have kids anymore and the chance of me carrying a baby to terms were very low anyway."  
He nodded again. She could see the sadness in his eyes as he was remembering that.  
"Then we stopped trying, and we stopped having sex. Or at least it became rare. That was around the time I started working with Michael."  
He shivered, knowing she was coming to the cheating part. He couldn't help himself but to picture her with him and it was killing him. She had stopped, seeing how uncomfortable he was, but he still wanted to hear everything. In his mind knowing the whole truth was the only way he could have some closure. Some would have found it weird but it made sense to him. "Go on."  
"I wanted to feel desired. And Michael was there and I could see he wanted me. But at the time it wasn't him I wanted, it was you. So at first I didn't respond to any of his approaches. But when I would come back home you would already be asleep or too focused on something else, so I started wondering what it would be like with Michael. And then when he tried to kiss me I just surrendered because it had become a need."  
He wasn't looking at her anymore but she knew he wanted her to go on anyway, so she did.  
"It was just sex. But then I could see that we both started developing feelings for each other and it was wrong because I was married to you, so I ended it. Tom and I started working on another show and I never saw Michael again. At least until we started Bombshell. I tried to make sure they weren't going to hire him but they went ahead and did it anyway. At first I thought it would be fine since now he had a family too, but seeing each other again awakened feelings that we had put aside and they were even stronger. I just couldn't resist. You know what happened then."  
"Yeah, I do..."

He finally raised his eyes to look at her and there wasn't any anger anymore. She could see resignation instead.  
"I have been offered a good teaching job in Boston. I think I'm going to take it."  
She was surprised. "But what about the house ? What about Leo ?"  
"I can't live in this house anymore. Anywhere I look I'm reminded of you and it's keeping me from moving on. I think Leo should stay in New York, he shouldn't change schools during his senior year. He could go and live with you and I could visit him on the weekends."  
"Are you sure that's what you want ?"  
"I think I am. That's for the best."  
"Have you talked to Leo about it ?"  
"No, I haven't. In fact I hadn't realized it was what I wanted before tonight. Thanks for helping me to move on."

They both rose and went to grab the boxes they had left in the bedroom. As they were both standing next to the door, they couldn't find a way to say goodbye.  
"Frank ?"  
"Yes ?"  
"I will always love you, you know."  
"I know. And I will always love you too."  
He wrapped his arms around her and they stayed like that for a few minutes, her head resting against his chest. She had no regrets about coming here. This evening had been what they had both been needing.

**Please review, and tell me what you think of it ! What should happen next ?**


	15. Chapter 15

**Not much happens in that chapter but I hope you'll like it anyway. I love it when you review, so please do !**

Later that night, when she pushed the door of her own apartment, Julia had the surprise of seeing Michael reading on her couch. She knew he was supposed to come over, and she had given him the keys a few weeks ago, but she thought he would have been gone by now. Her evening with Frank had been longer than what she had expected.

He raised his head when he heard her entering the room. There was a big smile on it. If only she could always be welcomed like that for the rest of her life.  
"Hey you."  
"Hi." She went to sit at the other end of the sofa, took off her shoes and put her legs on his lap, following an old habit she had taken with Tom over the years. "You waited for me ?"  
"I'll always wait for you." He put his book on the table in front of the sofa. "So, how did it go ?"  
"Actually it went fine. He was a little mad at first but I think he's moving on."  
"Good for him."  
"Yes. He is going to accept a job offer in Boston."  
"Really ? He is moving to Boston ? When ?"  
"Apparently they need him quickly, the teacher he is going to replace left without a warning, and since it's a really good school they don't like to leave students without a teacher."  
"But what about Leo ? He is not going to Boston with him, is he ?"  
"No, Frank says it's better if he moves in with me."

Michael could see how happy that was making her. It had been killing her not to be able to see her son more than a week out of two. And he could understand, he had even less time with his own son and the news of Monica letting Artie spend more time with him would be the best news he could ever hear. Unfortunately it wasn't going to happen in a near future. Even his lawyer, who was supposed to remain optimistic, had warned him that it was close to impossible, since she was the mother and he was the one to blame for the end of their marriage.

Julia understood what was happening in Michael's head and she lost her smile. She just brought her body closer to his, so that she could rest a comforting hand on his shoulder.  
"She will come around, eventually."

He was surprised that she had guessed what he was thinking about but, when thinking about it, his train of thoughts had been the most logical one. He was annoyed at himself for ruining her happy moment. She was supposed to celebrate the news, not worry about him.  
"Yeah, sure." He smiled while saying that, even though he wasn't thinking a word of it. When it came to Artie he had lost every hope but he wasn't willing to show it. "What about some wine to celebrate ?"  
"No, thanks. It's already late, we have a long day tomorrow. I think I'm going to go to bed." She rose as she was saying that and offered him her hand. "Are you coming with me ?"  
He took the hand she was offering and they both went to her room.

The truth was that she didn't want to celebrate the news because it didn't really feel like a victory. She still cared a lot about Frank and she was sad that he wouldn't be able to see Leo as much as he used to, especially when she was seeing how sad that was making Michael not to see Artie enough. But it was his choice, so she probably should have been enjoying the news anyway.

* * *

The sound of Julia coming out of the bathroom awakened Michael. She looked as sick as the precedent mornings but she had been hiding it from him and he had no idea why. He wasn't willing to ruin the moment by confronting her about it, even though he was dying to, so he just closed his eyes again and waited for her to go back into the bed and pretend she had never even been out of it. But he was worried, he promised himself he would question her about it before the end of the week, before Leo's week (during which he could only see her at work), even if she hadn't decided to bring it up yet.

She turned and saw him opening his eyes.  
"Good morning."  
"Good morning."  
"How are you ?" She planted a tender kiss on his lips while saying that.  
He responded with another kiss. "I'm always fine when I wake up next to you." He paused for a second, thinking of "Leo's week" had raised up a problem for him. "About that... What does Leo moving in means for me ?"

It was exactly the question she had been asking herself when she had just woken up and seen Michael next to her. Of course she liked it when Leo was there, even if he wasn't talking much, but there was always that time in the evening when she was trying to fall asleep all alone, and that time in the morning when she was waking up to an empty bed. Usually she was comforting herself by thinking of the following week, but if Leo was moving in with her, there would be no following week.

"You could try to join us for dinner at first, and then you could spend the night."  
"You said Leo wouldn't be okay with that."  
"I know but eventually he will have to get used to the fact that you are-" He raised an eyebrow and she blushed. "my boyfriend. Oh gosh I am way too old to be saying that, it's so stupid-"  
He drew her closer to him to make her stop.  
"No, it isn't. I'm honored to be your boyfriend."  
He leaned to kiss her but she suddenly rose and ran to the bathroom. He ran after her and arrived just in time to hold her hair as she was throwing up.

They were now both sitting on the floor of the bathroom in complete silence. Her face was really white and she looked as if she was going to throw up again. He waited for her to feel better before talking.  
"What's going on, Jules ? I know you've been trying to hide it from me but I also know that you have been sick every morning this week."  
"I don't know."  
He could see that she didn't want to talk about it but she would have to eventually, and the sooner the better.  
"Julia... Is it possible that you are... pregnant ?"

She paused for a second and shook her head, as if she was trying to make this thought go away.

"The same thing happened in Boston, even if it didn't last that long. I thought I might be pregnant then, so I took the test but it turned out I wasn't. It was just stress. And it's probably the same right now. We're opening on Broadway in one week and I'm not sure we're ready. I have reasons to be stressed."  
"You know we are ready, and I don't think it's stress. We have already worked together and nothing like that happened."  
"I'm not pregnant, Michael."  
"Well if you're so sure you won't mind taking the test if I bring it to you, will you ? And if, like you say, it turns out negative we are going to see a doctor."  
"Fine." It was probably just to make this conversation stop but it was enough for him.

He helped her getting up and ran to the drug store while she was eating her breakfast. On the way he couldn't help but think about what it would be like to have a baby with Julia and a big smile found its way on his face. That test had to be positive. They had deserved some happiness at last.


	16. Chapter 16

**This chapter is rather short but right now I'm just stressed about my exams results on Friday. It's stupid cause I can't do anything about it now, but anyway I'll stop talking about my oh so interesting life (irony intended) and let you read this chapter. Don't forget to tell me what you think of it ! Reviews are always welcome.**

Apparently he had gone really fast, because when Michael came back from the drugstore with the pregnancy test he had run to buy, Julia was still eating her breakfast like nothing had changed in his absence. He laid the test on the table, just next to her, so that she would notice it, but didn't say anything, so that she wouldn't feel like he was pushing her, even though she probably was already feeling that way.

She finished the bowl of cereals in front of her and grabbed the box she had been too scared to buy herself. She knew she would be disappointed if it turned out negative, and if it turned out to be positive she couldn't even imagine what would happen. That's why, until now, she had preferred not knowing, even if she knew this wasn't the right solution to her problems. In fact she was grateful that Michael had finally decided to do something about it.

She slowly rose from her chair and went to the bathroom. Michael followed her there but she wouldn't let him in.  
"I need to do this on my own." She was looking in his eyes and the only thing he could do was to respect her wishes so he let her close the door behind her, leaving him alone behind it. He was just standing there, not knowing what to do with himself, as if his whole life was depending on what was happening behind this door but he had no control about it. The only thing he could do was stand there, so he was standing there.

Behind the door Julia wasn't really feeling more comfortable. She was reading the instructions on the box but her mind was just so loud that she couldn't seem to make any sense out of it. She took a deep breath and cleared out her mind. She could do this, she just had to pee on a stick, how hard could it be ?

When she finally did what she had to do, she noticed that she wasn't wearing a watch, that there was no clock in her bathroom and that her phone wasn't here but probably in the living room. She couldn't go out and grab it because then she would run into Michael and right now she just needed privacy. It was already hard to deal with her own feelings, she couldn't deal with his as well. She damned herself for never wearing a watch and started counting the seconds in her head. At least it was keeping her mind busy so that she didn't have to think about the consequences this test would have on her life.

5, 4, 3, 2, 1, 0.  
She grabbed the test to see the result and put it back quickly. She tumbled down to earth, sitting next to the toilet, just where she and Michael had been sitting this morning, and just burst into tears.

Michael opened the door as soon as he heard her crying. Her head was on her knees and she didn't raise it when he opened the door. His first instinct would have been to go and hold her in his arms, but first he wanted to know what had made her react that way, so he went to see what the result was and was surprised to see that it was positive. Julia was carrying his child. For him it was only a source of joy and he couldn't understand why Julia was crying and couldn't seem to stop.

He went to sit next to her and gently put her head on his lap. The sobbing stopped as he was stroking her hair but the tears just didn't seem to come to an end.  
"Why are you crying Jules ? That's amazing, we're going to have a baby."  
She took her head off his lap and straightened up against the wall, still sitting next to him.  
"Me being pregnant doesn't mean we're going to have a baby. I have already miscarried two and the doctors said my chances of ever carrying one to terms are really low. And I don't think that me getting older really helps with that."

Michael nodded as he was taking in the informations. The joy he had been feeling was slowly decreasing. But somehow he still had hope. Deep inside him something was telling him that everything would be fine, that they would see that baby one day.  
"I don't want to go through it again. I think I won't be able to handle it this time."  
"I will always be there with you, through everything. No matter what happens you can count on me." He put his hand on her stomach, where his son or daughter was already growing up. "Maybe we will have our miracle."  
Her tears had stopped and she finally smiled. It was a small smile but it was there.  
"I hope we will." She put her hand on top of his.  
"I have always wanted to have another kid, Jules. The fact that it's with you just makes my heart flutter."  
She laughed at what he had just said. It was so cheesy. But somehow it made her heart flutter too and she laughed as she was thinking that. They were so cliche. "Me too, I just thought that would never happen. Even the adoption wouldn't work."

They both leaned towards each other and when their lips met it was like electricity running through both their bodies. The news of Julia being pregnant was finally accepted like good news and they intended to enjoy it. Their clothes were rapidly discarded all over the bathroom floor and the tears were long forgotten. Now they were just enjoying each other and celebrating the life growing inside her. She was aware that it was her last chance at being a parent again and she promised herself she would do everything she could to make it work.


	17. Chapter 17

**I'm sorry if I have been keeping you waiting ! Here is chapter 17, I haven't worked on it a lot though, so he might not be great. And you might wonder why I wrote this chapter but I don't know myself, I just wanted to write a scene between Julia and Derek because they've never explored this relationship in the show I guess. But I'll let you read. Don't forget to review at the end ! (I also wanted to say that the story is coming to its end since the characters are almost in the place where I want them to be.)**

They made it to the rehearsal space a little late that morning. With everything that had happened it wasn't surprising but, since nobody knew, they got yelled at by a really angry Derek. They didn't even bother answering, knowing there was no use, and both went their separate ways. Derek was becoming more and more harsh as the opening was approaching, but Julia knew that it was because he really cared for the show and wanted it to be amazing, and not because he was angry at all of them. She would just have wished for him to take a step back and realize that the show was already amazing and that he could just relax.

A few hours later he suddenly snapped at her while she was lost in her thoughts.  
"Julia ! Can you please wake up ? I need you to change the transition between these two songs, I think it's too short."  
She wasn't even sure of what he was talking about. But what she was sure of was that the transitions had all been rehearsed and were all long enough to allow every changes of decor or dresses. So she just answered with a calm voice, trying to make him relax.  
"Derek, you need to calm down. The transitions are perfect the way they are, I don't see why I should change them."  
"Because I'm asking you too ! Because the show is in one week and we're not ready ! Because I don't want a technical problem to make us look like fools ! God dammit, Julia, can't you just make the damn transition longer ?"

Everyone was looking at them now. They were used to Derek yelling at them but it was rare for him to direct his anger at Tom or Julia. The both of them were usually sitting quietly at their table, making a few changes when they thought it would sound better. But Tom wasn't currently here to defend Julia, which he probably would have done, even if she didn't want him too. She was all alone facing the fury of Derek and usually she would have yelled back at him but right now she was just feeling sick. She tried to repress the urge of throwing up but her body wouldn't let her. She rose, aiming for the bathroom, but Derek misinterpreted.

"Don't you dare walk out on me without a word ! Just make yourself useful and add three more lines, how difficult is that ?"  
Michael was starting to see red. Of course Derek couldn't know that right now Julia needed anything but stress. But it was no reason to treat her that way.  
"Can you please try not to stress her !"  
Derek turned to Michael, surprised of the interruption. "Can I know why ?"  
"Because-"  
"Michael !" Julia looked really upset. She had made him promise that morning that he wouldn't tell anybody and now he was about to make a public announcement in front of all the cast and crew ?

He looked at his feet, realizing what he had just been about to do. Personally he would have loved to tell everybody that he was going to be a dad again but he remembered his promise. She didn't want everyone to be informed until she was sure this one would stick. And he knew he couldn't understand how bad she had been hurting when she had lost her previous babies. The only thing he could do was to help her have it her way this time. "Sorry."

But Julia stormed off, as the urge of throwing up had become more and more urgent. Everyone misinterpreted her actions once again and the room fell silent. Seeing that he wouldn't get the cast to focus right away Derek went to follow her. Michael made one step to follow him but Derek suddenly stopped.  
"I can deal with this myself, thank you." He snapped at Michael who understood that it would be better for him to stay where he was. Anyway Julia could speak for herself and he knew it.

After Derek had left, Michael looked around him. All eyes were on him and he could hear whispers around him. It was Ivy who broke the silence.  
"Don't you have better things to do while we're on break ? Knowing Derek we might not get another one soon." She took Michael's arm and they went to sit in a corner of the room. Everybody had stopped looking at him and they were all enjoying their break.  
"Thanks, Ivy."  
"You're welcome." And she didn't say anything more. Somehow along the way they had become friends. They had like a mutual understanding which didn't require much words. They could rely on each other when their problems just became too heavy to carry. And with the lives they had, it was happening quite a lot.

Julia was bent over the toilet when she heard someone opening the door of the restrooms. She assumed it was Michael, since it was the more obvious possibility.  
"I'm fine, just throwing up." Her good mood had come back. "Because of you, I might had." She laughed at that and rose. She was feeling much better. But when she came out of the stall she was surprised to see Derek waiting for her with a puzzled look on his face. She decided to ignore him and went to the sink.  
"Julia, what's going on ?"  
"I'm pregnant." She probably shouldn't have told him but, with everything he had heard and seen, he would probably have figured it out quickly anyway. And somehow she wanted to tell him, she wanted to talk about it with someone who wouldn't judge. With someone who wasn't really involved in the whole thing.  
"You're what ?" He seemed thunderstruck.  
She turned to face him and looked right into his eyes. "I'm pregnant, Derek."

He remained quiet for a few minutes but she didn't move.  
"I'm sorry that I yelled at you earlier. I'm a mess right now."  
"I know, I didn't take it personally. But you really need to relax, the show is really great. You've done an awesome job. Only a great director like you could have been to able to turn the fact that there are two persons, -who don't look alike, let's face it- playing Marilyn into something we can all believe. And the show is even better than it was in Boston. It's going to be a smash, Derek !"  
"Thank you. You've done a great job too."  
It sounded just like if they were in an alternate universe. Neither one of them was really sure it was real but somehow it felt right.

"The baby, it's Michael's, isn't it ?"  
She nodded.  
"How far along are you ?"  
"Not much. Four weeks maximum."  
He smirked. "Four weeks as in the time I found your dress in here ? Well, I guess I should say congratulations."  
"Thanks." She sighed. "Everything is a mess. How did life get so complicated ?"  
"If you find out, you tell me, darling."  
"How are things going with Ivy ?" She couldn't believe she just asked Derek that question. They had never been close but at the time she was feeling as if she could say anything. They were in a place where they just needed to let everything out and they didn't care for the other to see what was under the mask.

He hesitated a few seconds before answering but he was feeling like he could say anything too. He hadn't opened up for a long time and oddly it felt like it was the time to open up right now, even if he wasn't close to Julia (but who was he close to anyway ?). He laughed inwardly, Americans was starting to rub off on him.  
"Well, we're not going anywhere. We never have, we never will. We both know it, but neither one of us is leaving."  
"I heard some rumors about you and Karen too."  
"I hate the gossip mill... In fact I don't think I'm attracted to her, at least not in a sentimental way. I thought I was for a while but it's probably just professional. It's like she's Marilyn in my head. It's really weird."  
"I think I know what's your problem."  
"Really ? You wouldn't be the first to tell me that..."  
"These girls are too young, they are just starting their career. They are struggling to make it, whereas you, you are already at the top. You're just not at the same stage in your life. You need to start dating women your own age."  
"And what if I don't want to get involved with someone ?"  
"I know you do, you would have left Ivy a long time ago if you didn't."

He looked at his watch.  
"We should probably get back to work."  
"Yeah, probably."  
Before opening the door he turned to her one last time. "It was... nice talking to you." He looked confused.  
"It was nice talking to you too."  
"But this never happened, ok ? You can't tell anyone about it."  
She laughed. "Are you scared for your image of_ 'terrible human being'_ ?"  
He laughed too. "Very scared."  
"Don't worry, I wouldn't have talked about it anyway."

And they returned to work as if nothing had happened, but Julia knew that she had made a friend in that bathroom. And suddenly she was happy. Whatever her life would turn out to be, she was surrounded by great men who cared for her. Tom, Leo, Michael, Derek... even Frank still cared for her, she could sense it when he was coming over to see his son, and deep down she still cared for him too. Actually she cared for all of them.


	18. Chapter 18

**I'm so sorry for the delay (and for not proofreading, if I do I'll never publish it). I just had so much stuff to do ! Anyway I hope you'll like that chapter. Don't forget to tell me what you think of it !**

One month had gone by. The opening on Broadway had been amazing. Everyone had just been perfect and the audience had remained standing and applauding for a really long time. The critics weren't all good but you can't never satisfy everyone and most of them were only saying amazing things. The audience loved it and that was what mattered. Every night the room was complete and everyone was leaving with a gigantic smile on their faces. The duo Levitt-Houston seemed to have come up with a smash, once again.

Julia could still remember that night. Her doctor had told her to stay calm, so she had tried to focus on all the good things and it had really made that evening special for her. Usually she would just have worried about what everyone would think of the show, but not this time. This time she had enjoyed it. She had been sitting next to Tom, both of them admiring their respective lovers on the stage. They had laughed together, cheered together and let go of some tears at the end together.

Then, she had run into Will, Jack and Karen. She could still remember what Karen had told her. _The gays loved your show, honey. As for myself I have to say well done with that Joe DiMaggio ! I might even get jealous, if you had more money, that is._ It had been a really long time since the last time she had seen Karen and it was like nothing had changed. By some miracle (or probably some talented doctors) she hadn't aged a bit, and she was still that same drunk drug addict she had always been. Somehow it was reassuring to see that some people never changed.

Derek had also been really nice. His attitude had changed a little bit since he had found out she was pregnant. He was more caring, more protective. He had always been saying that kids were perplexing him, but she was beginning to think that it wasn't true. Of course nobody had understood that change, since nobody knew. The pregnancy was a secret for everyone except Michael and Derek.

A few weeks after the opening she had told Leo too. He was worried because she was still sick in the mornings, something only him could see, and sometimes Michael but since Leo had moved in he wasn't spending the night very often. She wanted to make it as easy as possible for Leo, and she had noticed that seeing Michael at the breakfast table was making her son quite uncomfortable. However she was hoping he would be okay with it soon because she was never happier than when she had the both of them at her breakfast table.

When she had told him about the pregnancy, he had remained silent for a long time. He had seemed stuck and she hadn't dared to move. Eventually he had probably realized that there was nothing he could do anyway, that that baby was going to come no matter if he wanted it or not, because he had mumbled "congratulations". They had never really talked about it since, but sometimes she was catching him staring at her belly and smiling slightly, even though he would never admit it. For now, she wasn't asking for more. He still had seven months to get totally used to the idea.

Everything was going fine, except she still hadn't told Tom. It was like a giant elephant in the room that only she could see whenever she was with him. She didn't know why she still hadn't told him. She should have been really excited to share the news with her best friend but something was keeping her from telling him and she had no idea what. Maybe because it would become even more real than it already was. Or maybe because he knew about the miscarriages, because he had been there for every previous ultrasounds, and, unlike Derek and Michael, he would worry more than he would be happy. With Michael's excitement she had almost forgotten all the bad things that could happen and she preferred it that way.

But her first ultrasound was in two days and she needed Tom to be there. That's why today she had gone to Tom's apartment with the intention of telling him. She let herself in, as always, and found him sitting at his piano. Even if they were on break for now, he could never get away from the piano and she loved him for that. She came close to him and he noticed her as he raised her eyes. He stopped playing and looked at her.

"Tom, I have to tell you something."  
"I'm listening."

She was still standing and he was looking at her from his seat. It strangely looked like that time she had confessed her affair with Michael and it made her a little bit nervous. But that time she didn't have to feel guilty. Her divorce with Frank was final and she had every rights to start a family with Michael. However the words wouldn't come out of her mouth. He was still staring, starting to frown, so she just blurted it out. "I'm pregnant."

He widened his eyes, like every time he was surprised. "You are ?"  
"Yes, I am."  
"How far along are you ?"  
"Two months."  
"Two months ? And you're only telling me now ? Do I get the right to be angry ?" He was half-joking, half-serious. She knew she should have told him sooner.  
"Please, don't be. I need you to come with me to my ultrasound in two days."  
"What about Michael ? Shouldn't he be the one going with you ? Have you at least told him you were pregnant ?"  
"Of course I have, he was the one who made me take the test. But..." A shadow crossed her face, suddenly she seemed a little bit sad. "I might cry, and it won't be from joy. You're the only one who will understand. Michael will just think I'm weird, or I don't know what. I don't want to ruin the first moment he will see his kid. I had a hard time convincing him but he finally agreed that he would go to the next one, when I will only be happy because I'll know we actually have a chance to see that baby growing up one day. So will you come with me ?" She was looking at him with begging eyes.  
"Of course I will, honey. I'll always be there when you need me, I'll be drying your tears with my sleeve."  
They both laughed and she leaned to hug him.

She was afraid he would be more upset with her not telling him earlier, but somehow she could feel that he had understood why she hadn't told him sooner. He knew her way of thinking and it didn't really matter how and when he had found out. Now he was just happy at the prospect of becoming an uncle again.

He started playing softly on the piano. It sounded just like a lullaby.  
"It's for the baby."  
She would have understood it even if he hadn't said it. He wasn't the only one to understand the inner working of the other. She started making some lyrics up, leaning her head on Tom's shoulder. She was glad that he finally knew.

**I just wanted to say that I may have borrowed the idea of the lullaby from theatre is love31 who is playing Tom in an awesome Smash RPG here on fanfiction. By the way if you'd like to join us, you're welcome, we could use some more people ! Just go to the forum called "Smash RPG Season 2" in the Smash forums to see it, and you can PM me if you have any questions. Anyway, thanks for reading this chapter and I'll try to put the next one more quickly.**


	19. Chapter 19

**I'm so sorry for the delay. I'm just so lazy when I'm on holidays and the days are just too short... So there has been a little jump in time, I hope you won't mind. And I had more ideas for the end of the scene but this would just have made it too long so I'll probably save it for the next chapter. But I'll stop talking and let you read. Don't forget to tell me what you think of it in the reviews ! They are highly appreciated, I can assure you of that.**

Several months later Tom was sitting in the waiting room of an hospital. He could feel Sam squeezing his hand in order to calm him down but his foot was still moving up and down, and there was nothing he could do about it. On the other side of him he could sense Leo, whose feet was mirroring his exactly. They were both physically in that waiting room but their mind were further down the corridor and there was no distracting them from that.

A nurse finally came to them. Leo and Tom quickly jumped to their feet, slowly followed by a much less nervous Sam. But neither one of them was noticing the flagrant lack of enthusiasm of Tom's boyfriend. They were much too focused on what the nurse was about to say. She gave them a big smile and made her announcement with a warm voice. She was mainly looking at Leo who looked just like as he was about to burst. "Your mother is just fine and you now have a living and kicking healthy little sister."

Tom and Leo turned to each other and fell in one another's arm. They couldn't believe what was happening and the joy they were experiencing felt as if it was limitless. Leo had been waiting for so long to have a little sister that he had almost given up. Even with his mother being pregnant he hadn't quite realized he would actually get to be a brother in the end, probably because he had been too busy trying to stay mad at Julia for so long. But now all he could feel was joy and the anger had gone away. Tom, on the other hand, had been too busy worrying about this child never seeing the light of day that he had forgotten that this child might one day actually be living and breathing. Even when the doctors had assured him that everything would be okay and that Julia and the baby were as healthy as possible, he hadn't been willing to get his hopes up. But now this wasn't hopes anymore, this was reality.

Sam looked at them with a small grin on his face. His lack of reaction wasn't because he was lacking interest in Julia's baby but because, unlike the other two, he had always believed in that baby. From the moment Tom had told him about Julia being pregnant, he had had the feeling that everything was going to be just fine, that now was their time to be happy. He looked at the nurse with his charming smile, being the only one left with his two feet on the ground.

"Can we see them ?"  
"Of course, she has been asking for you."

Sam put his hand on Tom's shoulder and Tom finally moved away from Leo's arms. He took the hand Sam was offering him and they followed Leo into Julia's room.

But the three of them stopped after entering the room. The picture in front of them was just too perfect to be broken. Julia was in her hospital bed, holding the baby in her arms. She looked tired and sweaty but she was glowing with happiness and her smile had never been more large. Michael had climbed into the bed next to her and he had his arms wrapped around her shoulders. He was staring at his new kid, glowing just as much as Julia. All the drama they had gone through was forgotten. Now they were just that happy family who had just welcomed a new member. A tear began falling on Tom's cheek. He had never thought his best friend might get that happy again.

Julia noticed them as Tom moved his hand to wipe the tear off his cheek. "Hey you."  
They all came closer to her bed, too amazed to get one single word out of their mouths. It's Julia who broke off the silence by handing the baby to Leo. "You wanna hold your sister ?"  
He didn't say anything, tears were beginning to form in his eyes and his throat was swelling. He just grabbed his sister a little clumsily and fell in love with the big translucent eyes with which she was looking at him. When he raised his eyes, he noticed that everyone was looking at him with friendly smiles. Even if he hadn't shown it in the past months, he was glad they were all part of his family, even if they weren't all linked by blood, and he smiled to show them that. He then turned to Tom, whose eyes were glued on the little human being in his arms, and handed him his sister.

Tom could feel Sam's arm around his waist while he was holding this little piece of perfection, perfect mix of Julia's and Michael's amazing features. He turned his head towards him and he could see that Sam was also thinking about the conversation they had had earlier about eventually adopting a child of their own. Their relationship wasn't there yet but they both hoped she would be soon. Then he turned his eyes to the perfect couple in the bed. "And what's her name ?"

Michael and Julia turned to each other and smiled. It was Julia who told everyone.  
"We were thinking about Marilyn, what do you guys think of it ?"  
They all laughed but deep down they liked it. This wouldn't be an easy name to live with but this just made perfect sense. It was Marilyn who had brought them all together.  
"I love it." Tom simply said.  
"Jeez, another Marilyn !"

They all turned to where the voice had come from to find Derek laughing. He looked as if he had been running. "Derek ?" Tom was surprised to see him here. Julia had told him that he had been really nice to her and really helpful with everything she needed, but somehow he wouldn't believe her. This was Derek she was talking about !

"I came as soon as I heard." His eyes fell on the baby Tom was holding and his face froze. "Oh gosh, she is amazing, Julia."

"Do you want to hold her ?" Julia was acting as if everything was absolutely normal, whereas they were all startled by Derek's attitude. Apparently she was the only one who had been allowed to see that side of him.

Usually he wouldn't have acted like that in front of everyone else but today was a special day, he would have all the time in the world to get back his bad reputation another day. So he bit back the snarky comment he was about to make and nodded. Tom looked at Julia with a puzzled look. But she nodded too so he had no other choice but to hand the baby over to Derek, who took her as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

Tom smirked. "I thought the child thing had never ceased to perplexe you."  
"Back off, Tom." Derek didn't give him more than a few seconds of a death glare before drawing his attention back to Marilyn and offering her a smile he had never offered anyone before.

Julia looked at all the men in her life. She was glad they were all here, surrounding her with all their love. She was fighting to keep her eyes open and revel in the moment a little bit longer, but the nurse came back into the room and noticed her sleepy eyes.

"It's a little bit crowded in here, what do you say about all giving her a little space and coming back later ?" She took the little girl from Derek's arms and watched them all go through the door, even though none of them seemed willing to go. She then turned her attention back to the bed, where Michael was still holding Julia in his arms. "You too, sir."  
"But..."  
"There is no but, she need rest and you will have all the time in the world to see her later." She had this stern look that worked on all the patients' families, so Michael complied and kissed the redhead one more time before leaving the room. The nurse was right, now he had all the time in the world to spend time with Julia, he wasn't the other man anymore.

Once he was gone the nurse helped Julia making herself more comfortable and looked at her with a comforting smile. "That's some family you got."  
"Yes, they are great." And she closed her eyes, finally getting the rest she needed.


	20. Chapter 20

**It's been a really long time. I'm so sorry for that. But I finally wrote something and you will be happy to know it's the longest chapter I have ever written. I warn you though, it's very fluffy. I wanted to write an epilogue but I'm lazy and this chapter really ends the story nicely. Tell me what you thought of it!**

The first thing Julia's eyes caught when she woke up from her nap was the sight of Michael looking at her from the chair next to her hospital bed. She smiled and tucked one loose strand of hair behind her ear. "You know it's creepy to watch me sleep, right ?"

He responded by a smile. She could see that he was happy she had finally woken up. She wondered if she had been sleeping for a long time and looked around for something that might tell her the time. But there wasn't anything on the walls, not even a small picture to brighten the room, and no alarm clock on the nightstand. It wasn't a big deal anyway.

She moved a little in her bed, trying to sit rather than just lie. When she finally managed to find a position comfortable enough she rubbed at her eyes sleepily. If she was that numb she had probably been sleeping for a long time. She wondered if Michael had been there the whole time. After the way she had yelled at him while giving birth to her daughter, and how unattractive she had felt for quite some time now, she was surprised to see him still waiting at her side. She smirked, she was in the mood for some teasing.

"Still there ? You didn't grab the chance to run away ?"  
"No, the nurses wouldn't let me." He joked but she could see that he didn't like what she was implying, and she felt a little bad about even thinking to say something like that. He had been perfect through all her pregnancy, knowing exactly what to do and when. Sometimes she wondered if it was all coming from his own experience with Monica, but she liked to think that it was because they were connected on some higher level. She wasn't really fond of the idea of being the other woman but she couldn't really complain, Michael had always been the other man. From time to times she wished they had met earlier in their lives, maybe everything would have been easier then. But then she could see what her life was right now and she was quite happy things had gone that way. Had things been different, maybe she wouldn't have been that happy.

"I'm glad you're here." She gave him the most honest smile she could give. If he didn't see that he was making her the happiest woman in New York, then he would have to be blind. He took her hand and squeezed it, as a way to show her that he was glad to be there too. He didn't have to voice it, his eyes were doing all the work for him. The both of them had always had that ability to communicate by just looking into one another's eyes. It was stronger than any form of conversation. Their eyes couldn't lie, whereas their words could and had many times in the past.

"How is Marilyn doing ?" She knew the nurse had taken her to the room with all the newborns and she was already missing her.  
"She is wonderful, I could look at her for hours."

She smiled at the sparkle that had appeared in his eyes. She hoped it would still be there when their daughter would keep them up all night.  
"And Leo ?" Her son had finally made peace with the whole new family they were going to form. He was getting along well with Michael, just as he had been doing before he found out about the affair, or at least something close to that. And he had been really excited about the arrival of his little sister.  
"He keeps smiling. I think we will have one great babysitter."  
"That's good because I intend to go out with you."  
"Really ?" He lifted an eyebrow in a suggestive way.  
"Really." She nodded and leaned closer to him before grabbing his face between her hands. She stared into his eyes for a few seconds before planting a small kiss on his lips. Then she slowly pulled away, leaving Michael a little startled.  
He smirked. "Don't I get more than that for waiting patiently at your side until you woke up ?"  
"I'm afraid you'll have to wait a little longer." She grinned back at him.

"Let's see if I can make you change your mind." He was now perched on the edge of his seat, leaning towards her bed so that their faces were merely inches from each other. He cleared his throat a little, more for dramatic effect than from real need. "Julia, you're the most amazing woman I've ever had the chance to meet. You made me a really happy man, even if it took some time. When I wake up in the morning and see your face I can only tell myself that I'm a very lucky man." Her cheeks were starting to turn red and she tried to make him stop but he kept going. "You're smart, funny, talented, beautiful-"  
She chuckled and he raised an eyebrow. "Oh come on ! You know it will take me a lot of time to get back to a normal shape, if I ever do-"  
He put his index finger on her lips to make her stop. "The signs of you carrying our daughter only makes you more beautiful. I don't care if you never go back to a perfect shape."  
She smiled and didn't reply but she had already decided she would do everything she could to erase the sign of her pregnancy. If you had a man like him, you did everything you could to keep him.

He pulled back and she was wondering why, when suddenly she saw him get on his knee. A rash of panic took hold of her. She hadn't planned that at all. She watched it happen as if it wasn't happening to her, as if she was watching a movie. He reached for his back pocket and took out a little box from it. Then he opened his mouth to talk but Julia was quicker than him. "Michael, don't." The excitement she could read on his face just a few seconds ago instantly faded and surprise took over. He couldn't understand why she stopped him and it was making it so much more difficult for her.

"I can't marry you."  
Now the surprise was starting to get mixed with pain. "What do you mean ?" He was still holding the little box in his hand, his fingers tight around it. He couldn't understand what he had done wrong. They were both in such a good mood and it had seemed like the right moment.

She straightened a little in her bed and took a deep breath. "Don't get me wrong. I want to spend the rest of my days with you, wake up every morning next to you and raise our wonderful daughter together. But marriage I can't. It would be wrong. I still care about Frank and I have a lot of respect for him. Marrying you would go against all of that. I know we don't like to talk about it but I betrayed my marriage for you. I could never stand in a church and look at all our friends and family without feeling ashamed of myself. But I really do want to spend the rest of my days with you."

He still seemed a little startled but the pain had gone away. He wasn't sure that he understood exactly what she meant but he understood it well enough. He put the little box back in the pocket of his trousers but stayed on his knee. He wasn't going to let that ruin the day. "Julia, do you want to spend the rest of your days with me, and not marry me ?" He put the emphasis on the not and she laughed.

"Of course I do !"  
He went back on the edge of his seat so he could take her in his arms. They held tight and their lips met. It was sweet at first but then her lips parted and it all became more passionate. She was tugging at the hem of his shirt, having totally forgotten that they were in her hospital room, when they heard someone at the door clearing his throat. It's Julia who got to see who it was first. "Frank ?!"

At the mention of the name Michael quickly pulled back and jumped to his feet. "Frank. Hi." He was standing uncomfortably, not really knowing what the appropriate thing to do or to say was. He ran his hand through the hair at the back of his head, a gesture he was used to do for lack of something else.

Julia wasn't really feeling much more comfortable than he was. She was also standing straight, even if it was from her hospital bed. She had an embarrassed smile on her face. Frank had never caught them actually kissing and she thanked god it hadn't happened before. She could have crawled into a hole somewhere to avoid his eyes.

But Frank wasn't here to be unpleasant. Actually it was quite the opposite. He still wasn't sure why but he wanted to congratulate them on the birth of their new daughter. He had flowers in his hands and he looked at the embarrassed couple with a smile. Even if he wouldn't admit it because he had decided to be nice from now on, he enjoyed seeing them both so uncomfortable. He was the one who would decide how things would go and it was glad to finally have some power. "Hi. I brought you some flowers." He raised his hand to show the ones he was holding. "Leo told me you were all here. I saw Marilyn and you both did a good job, she looks great."

"Thanks." Julia and Michael both smiled, still a little ill-at-ease.  
"I would have come in earlier but I felt like I would be interrupting... I waited at the door instead."  
"Really ? How long have you been standing there ?"  
"Long enough." He smirked as their cheeks turned red. He knew he shouldn't have listened but it had been stronger than him. Especially when Michael had tried to propose to his ex-wife. He had been touched by her reaction. Maybe they really could try to be friends. "I wanted you to know that I still care for you too. You should move on. You could get married if you wanted to." But it was more a polite saying than what he really thought. Actually he had been surprised by how much their way of thinking was alike. He had noticed that Michael hadn't really understood but he hadn't been in their marriage for eighteen years. It was normal.  
"You know I couldn't."  
"Yeah..."  
"But thanks for saying so."

He looked at her tenderly, and put the flowers on the table at the other end of her bed. "I should go, I have a train to catch. But it was nice seeing you." He paused for a second and it looked as if it was hard to say what he was about to say. "Both of you." He walked towards Julia and gave her a small hug. Then he stood next to Michael, without really knowing what to do. Michael tried to take the first step and raised his arms to give a polite hug but Frank took one step back. "I'm not there yet. I hope eventually I would, but not now."

"I get it, really I do." Michael was already really surprised by Frank's appearance and how nice he had decided to be. Monica wasn't half as nice as he was. She was still really pissed at him but he hoped they would be more civil eventually.

So they both smiled awkwardly to each other and Frank left the room. Michael turned back to face Julia and saw her smile widely. "What ?"  
"I think we're all going to be okay."


End file.
